Weeble

A set of plastic toys for preschoolers.
Includes a variety of colors and shapes, some imitating animals, etc. Distinctive by their round bottoms that enable them to rock back and forth, without falling over.

Hence, the oft-repeated commercial jingle:

"Everybody loves a weeble,
Weebles wobble, but they don't fall down."

This song is often sung outside bars early in the morning as people do very bad weeble imitations. Bad in that they do actually, well, you know ..

A genuinely loathsome toy, loathsome not only for its repulsive habits and unsavory personal characteristics, but also for the advertisments wherewith it was sold: "Weebles wobble but they don't fall down!" AARRGGHH!

My heart is full of hate for these mercenary mmmmutants of marketing: In my feverishly sweating brain their hellish cries echo still. They pursue me.

What was the thing? It was a harmless thing on the face of it: An ovate plastic . . . thing, with a face, and with a weight in the fat end so that it would stay upright. Yet it would . . . wobble . . . Apparently there were millions of entertainmentally deprived children in this dying republic of ours, who found it amusing . . . They're all dead now, no doubt, garroted in secret at a tender age for unspeakable crimes . . .

wedgitude = W = weeds

weeble /weeb'l/ interj.

[Cambridge] Used to denote frustration, usually at amazing stupidity. "I stuck the disk in upside down." "Weeble...." Compare gurfle.

--The Jargon File version 4.3.1, ed. ESR, autonoded by rescdsk.