Why is rape wrong only when a man commits it?

I was wondering around E2 and read Pseudo_Intellectual's, Universal Dirty Old Man Constant node, where he (I presume) stated, "There is no Universal Dirty Old Woman Constant because, so far as I can tell, society very much wants me to believe that there is either no such thing as a Dirty Old Woman.." That reminded me of an interesting story I read.

Every year conservative columnist John Leo does a story on the years double standards, and this year (U.S. News and World Report - 6/26/00) he mentioned a story out of Georgetown University:

"Nowadays feminists detect dangerous pro-rape attitudes in jokes, complimentary remarks, and even glances, but the statutory rape of a 13-year-old girl in a popular feminist show has passed almost without comment. The show is The Vagina Monologues, and the reason for the absence of criticism is that the show's fictional perpetrator was a lesbian, age 24. So the all-female rape is described by the victim as "a good rape."(My italics) No word yet from feminist theorists on this new distinction between good rapes and bad. "Why is rape only wrong when a man commits it?" wondered the new conservative columnist at the Hoya, Georgetown University's student newspaper. This is a perilous thing to wonder at a politically correct encampment like Georgetown. His column was killed, and he was fired."

Granted it is only a show, but the columnist asked a probing question, and lost his job in a knee-jerk reaction. Why?

Are you asking whether the rape double standard is wrong, or whether the columnist's dismissal was wrong?

IMO (which I'm sure all of E2 cares deeply about) both are wrong. First: the double standard. See "Women rape too, they just don't get in trouble for it." if you don't believe a woman forcing herself on a man can be a traumatic event for him. Wow. Nevertheless, I've heard (ah yes, now there's a reputable source) that the reason less (for example) statutory rapes of males by females are prosecuted/reported is that the guy doesn't think they've been taken advantage of. Whether this is true or not I don't know. But when I was a teenager, if a 24-year-old woman had wanted to have sex with me, I might have been thinking "Wow, cool!". This does not mean it's not criminal! I can't speak about female-female rape specifically, I don't hear about it that often (I've recently read one account of it happening in jail). However, sex under pressure/coercion is always a bad thing regardless of who does it.

The firing: universities are supposed to be hotbeds of radicalism, but in reality they are chock-full-o'-conformity. At my school, the formerly-very-"alternative" newspaper has had its wings clipped any number of times for saying oh-so-dangerous things. Your beleagured "conservative columnist" merely fell victim to the same thing that has been happening to leftist/feminist/etc. journalists for ages. It's not that there are packs of unshaven, strident lesbians running around demanding the instant expulsion of this fellow. "Political correctness" is a myth, fostered by a few extreme examples that prove nothing but that anyone can be an ass, regardless of politics. U.S. News and World Report was just ensuring that they didn't offend anybody, thus ensuring their bland, crappy existence for another day.

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sgs: Good points! It always kind of bugs me when people make jokes about prison rape, especially when I find myself doing it. There's a perception that rape in prison is somehow "poetic justice" or that it only happens to sex offenders. In fact, it happens to a lot of new inmates of all stripes, often on their first day in jail. it's a serious problem that corrections officials seem reluctant to do anything about.

...against a woman? Stephen Donaldson reported in a May 1995 USA Today newspaper article that 300,000 males are raped each year in prison. He goes on to say that "This compares with a 1992 BJS estimate, based on a (still underreporting) annual household victimization survey, of 135,000 female rapes a year outside confinement."

While this is sick, what saddens me even more is that the rape of young boys is publicly defended by groups like NAMBLA, who state in their statement of purpose at http://qpd.tcp.com/qrd/orgs/NAMBLA/statement.of.purpose that "The North American Man/Boy Love Association (NAMBLA) supports the rights of all people to engage in consensual relations, and we oppose laws which destroy loving relationships merely on the basis of the age of the participants." I listened to a NAMBLA spokeperson on a radio talk-show, and he refused to say how young is too young for a child to consent to sexual intercourse. The host pressed. "Twelve? Ten? Is someone who is eight years old able to really consent?" The NAMBLA person would not answer the question but reaffirmed their position that it must be determined on a case-by-case basis. Read: maybe sometimes it is okay for an eight-year-old boy to have sex with an adult man. Excuse me while I go vomit.

No, I'm not forgetting priests, ministers, and other clergy who abuse their postition of trust. They deserve to have a millstone put around their neck as well.

I do not think the topic title is fair, because it seems to imply that the problem of women rapists even begins to compare with the problem of male rapists. The problem is not even of the same magnitude. Men are much worse. In ways and numbers that are not publicized.

Since I am already pontificating, I will echo my mom's sentiment that men who rape should be strung up by their testicles.

No, not all men are evil. But is seems that there are males who are all evil.

Of course rape is always wrong, whether done by a woman or a man and whether done to a woman or a man.

The trouble with women raping men is that that situation is even harder to recognize as rape (by others than the two persons involved) than the other way around. There is no tell-tale sperm to be found, often it is done by coercion not force, so there are no physical wounds to be seen. Often the man gets an involuntary erection during the rape, making him wonder himself if he truly does not want what is happening.

For all of these reasons, men find it harder to tell, and to prove, that they have been raped. And then of course there is the double standard that says only women can get raped because men supposedly always want sex with everybody and everything, and therefore never can be forced to do it against their will.