As a strong believer in Darwin's Theory of Evolution, I believe that the form, structure and function of everything in the body has a purpose. Now, in the case of breasts, if the purpose isn't for natural selection (see my writeup on breasts), then it's quite likely the purpose is for sexual selection.

Sexual cues are complex and intertwined with the vagaries of society. For a good read on this subject, there's The Third Chimpanzee by Jared Diamond, where there are some classic drawings showing relative breast to body size and penis to body size and testes to body size for some primates (chimps, apes, gorillas and humans) and a reasonable explanation for these.

Anyway, my take on why men like women's breasts is that this is the way we have evolved. It is who we are. Breasts indicate to men, at least on a subconscious level, that a woman is fertile -- inasmuch as she is past puberty and that her body can afford to waste energy on developing and carrying around nicely shaped but otherwise unnecessary pieces of fat -- and therefore a potential mate.

After all, the biggest misconception regarding breast size is that bigger equals better ability to lactate or provide milk for offspring. This has no scientific basis. A woman with an A sized cup can nurse just as many babies as one with a DD size (assuming both are healthy and there's nothing wrong with their ability to lactate). The vast majority of what makes up breast tissue in the non-lactating female human is actually adipose tissue (fat) and connective tissue.

On a personal level, I find it highly illogical that men like breasts as much as they do, but that hasn't stopped me so far.


Crow Jane: in a sense, you've got it. Estrus or ovulation in the human female is hidden (even from the said female herself), in stark contrast to what happens in pretty much almost every other animal in the world, where it is usually painfully obvious when the animals are ready for mating or are in heat.

It is arguable that the hidden ovulatory patterns of female humans has led to the situation where the male partner must stay close to his woman, guard her and mate with her on a reasonably regular basis to be reasonably sure that whatever children arise are actually his. This is probably a good thing.

Desmond Morris' theory is always good for a laugh or to break the ice at parties:

Chimpanzee (and, so is postulated, early human) females are only fertile for a certain part of their cycle. Unlike humans, dolphins and bonobos, who copulate at the drop of a hat, to conserve energy chimps only mate during the female's estrus, which is signalled by blood engorging the female's posterior - the male sees the big swollen ass, a switch flips in his head, and 4.3 seconds later - the deed is done.

Whether they're ruminating on the forest floor or brachiating (juss kidding - I don't believe chimps brachiate) they tend to roam around on all fours, making a receptively-inflated posterior quite a spectacle. It is thought that this visibility is one of the things pre-humans gave up as they adopted a bipedal stance - a combination of the change in orientation and stronger upper-leg muscles rendered the swollen area invisible between a woman's legs. So, it is thought, a more-visible analogue for them had to be developed.

Here's where we get to the breasts. Apes of all kinds (and indeed all mammals - it's what makes us mammals!) breast-feed their young and have sufficient equipment for the process, yet they don't have the great protruding hooters of the race Dolly Parton can be said to represent. It is supposed that both non-estrus sexual activity and pronounced breasts were successful evolutionary traits at getting around the males' disinterest at lack-of-genital-flares.

To succinctly summarize: we like big boobs because they remind the chimp part of our brain of a big swollen bum. Any questions?

They are soft, and cuddly, and warm, and smooth, and pretty, and they jiggle, and girls like to show them off, and sometimes, when I play with them, the girl will get really warm, and she'll breathe sometimes deep and sometimes shallow, and she'll get sweaty, and my fingers will slide around easier, and her nipples will get hard, and she'll ask me to rub them, and bite them, and they fit well in my hands, and she'll make little moaning noises, and they are very sexy, and it makes me feel good when I do all these things.

the evolution of perpetually noticeable breasts in the female human was nature's way of protecting human young. no, really, it works out that way in the end: visible breasts in other species demarcate the onset of estrus, females in estrus are more attractive to males because of their breeding potential. a female who always appears ready to mate will attract a large number of males, who will then defend the female and her young...

I am a man, and I like breasts. I have to believe that there is something inherent about liking breasts, something so rooted to my essence as to be undefined.
Example: Men (me, at any rate) look at the breasts of unattractive women. It doesn't matter how god-awful fugly the beast is, every single one of us will glance at her chest. I quite honestly can't help it.
There are times I wish I could. I was with some family friends at their swimming pool recently. The daughter is very pretty, with an impressive pair of breasts. This is of course unacceptable to me, to be attracted to my friend's daughter. Worse yet, she is only fifteen. I am not a pervert! The entire evening was ruined for me because of my instinct to look at the young girl's breasts.

To conclude: Men like breasts because they have to. It is hardwired into the brain. We have no control over it.
I am sorry, everything-ettes, but that's the way it is.

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