green ketchup

Heinz recently announced that they will introduce green ketchup this fall. Marketed to kids, the ketchup will come in a new bottle with a very small opening. This will make the ketchup come out in a very thin, high pressure stream which will allow kids to draw on their food with ketchup. The introduction of green ketchup is part of heinz's new marketing campaign which includes commercials on MTV with the slogan "makes buns happy." If you're curious about the green ketchup you can see it for yourself on heinz's website.

OK, here's what Heinz Ketchup is doing with this green ketchup crap. It's like the New Coke deal. Hell, go read that node about New Coke, and if you can stay awake long enough, you'll finally get to the meat on that bone. High fructose corn syrup is cheaper than cane sugar. Coca-Cola introduced the New Coke, knowing it would fail, only so they could get all the old Coke off the shelves and replace it with Classic Coke, with one little substitution. . .

This is what Heinz is doing right now! There is some ingredient in ketchup that is too expensive in today’s market. A cheaper replacement has been found, and a marketing genius has found a way to get all the old Heinz off the shelves so that when this green ketchup fails (as it must, I mean give me a break), the new, cheaper ketchup will be introduced. You'll never notice the difference!

God bless America! (I just wonder what that ingredient is?)