Findings:

• I don't hate people. Honestly. But the best conversation I've ever had still wasn't as good as the worst catnap I've ever had.
• I've had kisses that make Judas seem sincere
• The best tuna fish sandwich I've ever had
• She was feminine in the most displaced sense I had ever seen, a known quality refracted through stained glass windows.
• The most interesting job I've ever had
• I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.
• I was the worst lay you ever had
• Best smoke I've ever had
• Jobs I've Had
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever a bear
• Commit to paper the chances I've missed, the girls I've loved, the dogs I've kissed
• all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
• The best teacher I ever had
• I had to call my father this evening and tell him I was dying.
• Grammatical and syntactic puzzles
• that pain was something I needed, and probably did to myself
• Your shoulder is the most comfortable thing I've ever slept on
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• In a dream I had, I was on an island in the middle of the ocean.
• I was once young and had a home
• Neatest trip I've had
• The sparkle of this angled blossoming was invading the Earth, and Vug said, "It's spring!" I kissed him.
• The Worst Paper I've Ever Written
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• Probably the saddest thing ever
• The coolest I've ever felt, given that I didn't end up with a gun.
• I've had better hugs from wind gusts and dead people
• No one ever said that the moral process of humanization was necessarily a pleasant thing.
• The bravest man I've ever known
• Ever since I met you I've been looping a recursive subroutine
• By evening I will have returned all traces that I was ever here
• I've had you here before
• You know what? I've had it up to here with "Trix are for kids!" Give the rabbit a fucking bowl of cereal, you dick!
• the dead had risen, and there was nobody to pump gas
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• I've had a drunken kebab and loved it!
• I was a bitter, purple-haired fat girl, and I had plenty of male friends
• All you ever did was let it happen
• As I Was Going to St Ives
• You kissed me. It was sweet and timid.
• I've had enough of your disingenuous assertions
• I'm probably the best lover I'll ever have
• No one was ever fired for buying IBM
• Same as it Ever Was
• It was one of the worst things I have ever done
• Was it ever there?
• The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
• The saddest funeral I've ever performed
• The boldest lie I've ever heard
• She was the cutest necromancer I ever did see
• like nothing ever was
• I have no proof that he would ever want to kiss or destroy me.
• everyone who ever told me i was pretty was lying.
• Smartest thing I've ever read on Reddit
• I think I was watching the most beautiful thing I have ever seen
• What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
• The most difficult decision President Bush has ever had to make
• Was I nearly as anti-consumerism as I had initially thought?
• I was a young boy that had big plans
• She was thinking of a boy in California who had a couch and a job
• We kissed like we had never tasted lips
• He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
• I had never known someone whose death was imminent
• She was the prettiest, loveliest cat at the ball and she had upon her fine gilded whiskers.
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• The girls had gone wild and now my dad's cock was missing
• She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
• You had to pretend success was fucked
• When I was young Time had no wings
• I've had eighteen straight whiskeys. I think that's the record.
• This is the oldest I've ever been
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• Stuff was started stuff had ends
• The most fun I've had doing anything
• She had never kissed someone so old.
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• I've fucking HAD IT with you, you piece of shit!
• I've been smoking ever since
• She probably thought your first language was English; your real first language was Joyce
• "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
• The Only Song I've Ever Written
• I Kissed "Weird Al" Yankovic and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt
• It was a dark and stormy night. I had taken a creative writing class.
• I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
• This was the shinest golden dollar I would ever see in my life and I was not about to tarnish it.
• The tired scrawl of every word I've ever called my own.
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
• They all lived happily ever after
• ever
• Ever seen two people talking to each other in their sleep?
• oh ever so slowly
• So what ever happened to Yahweh's drinking buddies?
• The worst children's book ever
• Does this ever go away?
• Medgar Evers
• I will ever be your combustive tablature of igneous geometries
• Live the greatest story ever told
• Ever made it with an aardvark? We're quite rare.
• Do you start feeling, ever?
• Diary of a dot-commer
• Don't lie. Ever.
• The most beautiful computer ever
• The Craziest Lady to Ever Grace a Burger King Drive-Thru
• Ebonics began with pirates
• Have You Ever Walked?
• The most disturbing thing that I have ever seen on the back of a truck
• The most disturbing thing I ever saw
• The best line I ever used
• Longing for brief, but ever unattainable moment of... lucid thought?
• Why I can't seem to ever finish a node
• dr's Hospital Adventure : nurses put up with more than you can ever realize
• Don't you ever go to work?
• Will I ever know?
• the hottest it has ever been
• Have you ever been illusioned?
• Have you ever been so excited about your life that it makes you almost want to cry?
• What ever happened to all the fun in the world
• The funniest thing ever on Pinky and the Brain
• The dumbest thing I ever did while under the influence of alcohol
• You're the best thing that ever happened to me, no matter what
• The most confusing bet ever
• It won't ever remember what you choose to forget
• Soulmates who will never ever meet again
• I'm so sorry my brain works that way
• No one ever listens to the bassist
• The first bear I ever saw
• As you graduate from college, you are the most conservative you will ever be
• Things are more like they are now than they ever were before
• The greatest paper ever written
• Can pleasing sight, misfortune ever bring?
• When, if ever, will there be permanent peace in the Balkans?
• I wonder if he ever thinks about me
• There's no such thing as happily ever after.
• The best magic trick you've ever seen
• All I Ever Really Needed to Know I Learned in the Dot-Com Apocalypse
• Does it ever scare you to be you? Love, Mom
• The best comeback ever
• Everything You Ever Wanted to Know about Silence
• Have you ever made a just man?
• Nobody should ever see another's porn collection
• The longest, most complicated undelivered love letter ever
• Have you ever seen a despot with a little nose?
• Greatest Story Ever Told
• The most perfect thing you can ever do
• The U.S. Post Office: Benign little organization, or the linchpin of the greatest conspiracy ever?
• Everything you ever wanted to know about theatre tech, but were afraid to ask
• No one will ever love you for your honesty
• Best Death Ever
• The Greatest Story Ever Told
• No government can ever give you freedom
• Things you would bring with you if you were ever invited to shower with jessicapierce
• The Road Goes Ever On
• All I ever needed to know, I learned playing Dungeons and Dragons
• Deconstruction of every single television advertisement, ever
• The worst job interview ever
• The Last Song I Will Ever Write About a Girl
• middle of summer how crazy it was
• Johnny Evers
• The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows
• Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?
• first ever Round Valley Day of Gluttony and Tippling
• The harshest winter ever
• You, born of the water, could you ever live far from the sea?
• Snow-white solstice in Switzerland: first ever helvetic nodermeet
• only one justified teardrop ever in the history of the world
• risk assessment in the brain and the dumbest thing you ever did before age 25
• Shortest science fiction story ever
• Roller Derby
• Best Week Ever
• What did my spleen ever do for me?
• evers (user)
• Will the Atomic Bomb Ever Be Perfected, and If So, What Becomes of Robert Heinlein?
• If women ever show teeth in a quiet greeting, it is considered a threat.
• Have You Ever Seen The Rain?
• Just in case you ever wondered..
• Longest science fiction story ever
• Up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make
• have given my heart away just as carelessly and as meticulously planned as ever
• the only comfort we could ever have
• The only place I ever go is the grocery store.

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