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A fake Australian barroom game introduced in an episode of the Simpsons. Based upon a scene in Crocodile Dundee in which a miscreant holds our hero at knifepoint, only to have him draw an enormous knife on him, saying "that's not a knife, *this* is a knife" in a lovable Australian accent.

The mechanics of the game are relatively simple. There are two players, henceforth to be identified as Yahoo and Serious. In the first stage of gameplay, Serious draws (or otherwise draws attention to) a knife. During the second phase, Yahoo draws a spoon and intones, "that's not a knife, *this* is a knife" in an Australian accent (when possible). The final stage comes when Serious replies, "that's not a knife; it's a spoon."

While no official rules exist for scoring, it is rumored that success at knifey spoony relies as much on style as it does on strategy. Wise men say that often the finest players are those who are not familiar with the workings of the game. Others contend that while knifey spooney takes only a moment to learn, expert gameplay takes a lifetime to master. This matter we will leave to the philosophers.

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