Thursday, 2 November 2000 10:45
Time to go to school.
I made it to the platform just in time: the train was just now pulling into the station, and I darted on board just before the doors slid shut.
The first half of the car was full; or, rather, it was half-full: everyone was seated in the injection molded seats so that they took up two at a time, thus discouraging the possibility that they'd actually have to sit next to another human being.
I made my way to the end of the car, and sat down in one of the seats facing the window. It took me a moment before I noticed him. He was sitting alone in one of the dual seats, gazing out the window with a look of quiet desperation. His eyes had that glazed over, far away look.
Maybe it was that look that made him even more beautiful. Maybe it was just that he was tall, dark, and handsome. I fixed my eyes on him, and waited for him to turn.
His shoulders heaved slightly under his jacket as he sighed, shifted, squirmed in his seat. He was on his way to work, I was sure: he wore the standard issue blue button-down shirt and carried a laptop case, along with a white plastic bag of unknown origin. His lunch, perhaps?
I was going to flirt with him. For once, I was going to do it. I couldn't work up the nerve to smile at the boy in the library stairwell, but I was going to make up for it now. I knew nothing would come of it, but maybe it would at least lift the corners of his mouth a bit, and erase some of the sadness etched on his face.
I would have done it, too, if he had ever looked at me.
I wonder if he'll ever know that someone in this world thought he was handsome?