The testicles of young calves. My SO (who has actually eaten them on several occasions) says that they are best when fried in oatmeal and they're fresh. The calf testicles are apparently much better (less stringy or tough or something) than bull testicles.

We have a friend whose parents own a large ranch. They invited some friends out for their branding, and they brought their son, who is slightly odd (we think that he is perhaps slightly autistic). Anyways, he REALLY loved the prairie oysters. He kept asking,

"May I have another testicle, please?"

Them mountain oysters
Where'd they come from? Better ask
A'fore ya eat one.

As an 11-year-old immigrant to Kentucky, I was invited by the shriveled and hirsute (but hospitable) crone next door to sample a fresh batch of "mountain oysters" (a.k.a., "prairie oysters"), as a reward after I'd finished mowing her lawn. Leery of anything that might resemble mucoid discharge on the half shell, I asked what a mountain oyster was before accepting. "Why, hog balls," she said, casually.

Oh, blessed suspicion!

The Prairie Oyster, one of the classic hangover cures, was a favorite of Spike Spiegel, if you all remember your Cowboy Bebop.

It's not particularly tasty - as a matter of fact, most people have to hold their nose when they drink it - but, hey, hangovers suck:

Ingredients
Olive oil
Tomato ketchup
1 egg
Salt and pepper
Tabasco
Worcestershire sauce
Vinegar or lemon juice


To begin with, you pour the olive oil in the glass and spread it around, so that it covers most of the inner surface, and then discard the remainder. After that, you add about a table spoon of vinegar, a tablespoon of ketchup, a dash of salt and pepper, an a splash of worcestershire sauce (can mix or interchange with tabasco). Then, you must break the egg in such a way that you don't add the yolk yet, usually by pouring the egg over a fork or other sort of grill. After you get the runny part of the egg in the glass, mix all of the ingredients thoroughly. Lastly, you drop the yolk onto the top of the mixture, being careful not to break it.

Drink up!

Many variations on the Prairie Oyster float around and you may change small details here or there, but be careful, lest you ruin the magic. It actually has garnered such a mystique about its use that most Prairie Oyster recipes are family traditions.

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