Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "sorry, sweetie, you can't come to the bridesmaids' party because we're going to be fondling naked people/getting hammered/talking about our sex lives"

• You do realise that this is going to be our lives for the next ten years?
• I really came to understand that they were just real people who wanted to live real lives and be treated equally as opposed to, for example, wanting to destroy us.
• if I can't be with you, then I'll write about you, or I'll write about something else
• Expecting your wedding to be the happiest day of your life
• What people talk about when they can't think of anything to talk about
• They were getting into riot gear as we sipped our wine
• The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
• If we and our lives are worse for having spoken the truth, then we and our lives deserve to be worse.
• If there were more people like you, there would be less people
• I can't be a scientist because I don't believe in God.
• Maybe if we're lucky the person dreaming our lives will wake up
• Just so we’re all clear, it is okay to miss people who no longer want you in their lives
• If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
• Going by the script when talking to people
• we are starving because we are afraid of our own hearts, and there must be another way
• people who were not to be trifled with; people who would dance, and had no notion of walking
• Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask)
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• there must be something positive about this; I just can't think of it at the moment
• most people don't know what they're talking about anyway
• People tell us who they are, but we ignore it, because we want them to be who we want them to be.
• The world would be in much better shape if our leaders were hamsters
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• Forget what you think you know about the opposite sex
• Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues.
• If there were more people like you, there would be more people
• We are the People Our Parents Warned Us About
• If only our tongues were made of glass, how much more careful we would be when we speak.
• Talking about money is more taboo than talking about sex
• It’s not because of your unconventional ideas about sex. It’s because you’re fat.
• This is going to waste your time because its about Martin
• Someday my life will be interesting, and I will come back and tell you about it then
• The Joy of Pair Bonding: Talking About Sex
• thoughts and ideas ought to be convoluted, because the things and people that they represent are equally so
• Our lies reveal as much about us as our truths
• How is poetic form going to help me scream about revolution
• What we talked about when we were reading around the subject
• Talking about love is like dancing about architecture
• A lie only hurts when it's told by people you care about
• reality is always ready to teach us about how our ideas are wrong
• If I can't dance, I don't want to be part of your revolution
• It's hard to be enthusiastic about reading and books with someone that openly admits to being a bad reader
• Writing about sex
• I am sorry about the wings
• I will be the first thing you will be thinking about after you wake
• People who carp about their jobs
• When I look into her eyes, I no longer care about what the world thinks. This is what it feels like to be alive.
• You're not going to be happy until you put someone's eye out
• Bragging about a high IQ is way worse than bragging about having a large dick. The latter can at least be demonstrably used for something and be put to good use.
• Real hackers start their own IRC networks so that they can't be traced by the FBI
• Where be ye going, you Devon maid?
• Music need not be popular to be good
• Inability to decide on what your morals and values should be
• the world will be remade in our image
• Unborn to-morrow and dead yesterday, why fret about them if today be sweet!
• Just a NoCal noder party - nothing to get excited about, unless you count the fire
• The Lord of the Rings 1/2: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Middle-earth But Were Afraid to Produce
• George Bush doesn't care about black people
• I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a picture of a bunny with a pancake on its head.
• Nothing to worry about here! though It will come after a while.
• The cult leader poured himself a drink and started on about his plans, and I wondered how the priest was getting on
• I fall silent, listening. The breadcrumbs are talking about us
• This moment will never come again. Would you rather enjoy it or complain about it?
• Find someone who dreams about people like you
• 10 common myths about sex offenders
• 80% of the wealth on this planet is in the hands of about 220 people
• We tend to judge people only on what we perceive them to be
• Until I die there will be sounds. And they will continue following my death. One need not fear about the future of music.
• If anything were different, everything would be different
• play dumb
• "What *should* we be worried about?"; or how too many cooks make a statistically average soup
• Three people who are spies and a horse who will also be a spy
• Be our drone
• If by Dull Rhymes our English must be Chain'd
• Having sex in the shower ought to be outlawed
• Pretending to be someone else online and talking to your real-life friends
• Just because Linux is Free doesn't mean Linux Software has to be Free
• It's better to be alone than to wish you were
• I'm not talking about
• A joke about dealing with people
• In case you were wondering about cramps
• Stale, preconceived notions about the way women feel about sex
• We completely understand the public's concern about futuristic robots feeding on the human population, but that is not our mission.
• Sorry about the small penis
• Dos and Don'ts For Talking to Children About Abuse
• People who get worked up about misspelling Colombia
• Somewhere there is a syphilitic prostitute who is going to tell me about India
• What Italian guys are really talking about when they say "Ey Oh"
• Talking about death
• What I Want My Kids To Know About Sex
• What in God's holy name are you blathering about?
• This is how it appears on Wikipedia and they tend to be somewhat anal about grammar, so I'm trusting this is correct
• I know what is about to come
• What do girls think about guys who think about what other people think about girls and what they do?
• people got a lot of ideas about who i am
• You sad cookie, you CARE more about filthy rich pretty people you'll never meet
• to live outside the law you must be honest
• It's better to be lonely than to be with inferior people
• Well if it's gonna be THAT kinda party, then I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!
• What the American people want politics to be
• What's it going to be then, eh?
• It's hard to be enthusiastic about music with someone who physically sneered at Hamilton
• I'm going to be a Dad
• Should I be sorry?
• Religion doesn't exist just so that people can be told what to think
• grumbling dissertation on how everything would be much better if it all were to explode
• Don't want sex, be sexual
• It'd be nice to be a sex symbol
• God can't be all good and all powerful at the same time
• Why people who get the wrong number make it out to be your fault
• Sometimes friendships were meant to be destroyed
• Governments cannot be trusted with our personal information
• How precious can human life be? There are six billion people on the planet!
• Statements that would be shocking to people living in 1975
• Beggars can't be choosers
• It's better to be solitary than with incompatible people
• The Umbrella Academy is about damaged people
• the worst thing about sitting naked in a leather chair
• Laughing at what we call cloudbursts and showers and drizzles; knowing these are not subtle enough to mean anything about what comes from the heavens
• About gradual producing of the thoughts when talking
• Everything you ever wanted to know about theatre tech, but were afraid to ask
• Who cares about a bunch of people in Austria
• The average male thinks about sex every seven seconds
• Why can't I stop thinking about you?
• If you're going to complain about store policy, don't do it to the employees!
• General sexuality newsgroup
• Talking about the weather
• Being accurate about the small things is more important than getting the story fundamentally right
• They don't realize they're talking about death but I can hear it behind their voices
• When you can't talk about what your sexual needs are
• How to tell when a journalist has no idea what they're talking about
• all day I dream about sex
• I'm talking about the kind of love that keeps you alive.
• Sorry about my friend
• If I could be anything I'd be water and I'd be wild about it.
• The reason we were so excited about Y2K
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• The bored who complain
• this was supposed to be a parable about the power of the imagination
• I still can't think of anything about Fight Club that changed my life
• Thinking you know more about computers than the tech you just called
• Notes on What's What and on What it Might be Reasonable to do about Whats What
• Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody
• talking shit about a pretty sunset
• sorry about the mess
• It's not worth thinking about. Have some tea. Come walk with me.
• As long as we have the purple berries we needn't worry about our size.
• Fuck you I'm going to write poetry about your city
• Wandering about with keys dangling from an oversized shoelace around your neck
• Things About To Come My Way
• Some times your elders may know what they're talking about
• The guy who may as well already be dead and therefore doesn't care about the consequences of his actions and is able to move with perfect freedom for the remainder of what will likely be a tragically short life
• If you complain about the content of the news, you are deluded about its purpose
• sometimes i wonder about people who snap at strangers
• Talking about death 2
• i don't spend a lot of time thinking about what it feels like to be gored by a chainsaw
• In this moment I'm focused on my own emotions. I don't care about how you feel. I can't.
• I'm really sorry about that!!!
• There were a few moments you will not hear about, but they happened
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Rape Is About Sex
• What are you talking about?
• It hard to forget you now that my parents are okay with talking about you.
• certain wisdoms about a place can only come from dying there
• The thing to understand about trans people
• On reading letters that bitch about scantily-clad models on magazine covers
• people are lazy about explanations so they make rules
• just because i'm out on the balcony doesn't mean i'm about to jump
• what's the point of having other peoples' thoughts about something?
• Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
• I can't even begin to tell you how I feel about certain things for reasons that you may find difficult to understand
• There's so much to think about. I'm getting distracted.

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