Findings:
- The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
- I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
- Don't be a smartass and offer up a contrived solution that *technically* solves the puzzle but goes against its spirit
- Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
- you can give up, but there will always be those who do not
- Geeks make good lovers
- Let's Make Up and Be Friendly
- I may be cold and calculating, but that doesn't make me a computer
- Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
- She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
- I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
- Why is it bad to make gays bishops, but okay to kill them?
- Any fool with a dick can make a baby but it takes a real man to be a father
- The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
- May the world be a better place when I wake up
- I was throwing around useless proverbs when all she needed was to be held and told that she was beautiful
- Love cookies
- If I was any good at this, I would be getting paid
- Nah, these random encounters with beautiful strangers won't destroy me at all. But I guess I thought it'd be a good way to die at the time.
- Men are designed to be good hunters, but it's women who are born killers
- What consoles need to be as good as computers at games
- I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
- It was something that sand out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- This Star Wars sheet may be worth something, but I just need a tablecloth
- 'C' may be for cookie, but that's not good enough for me, dammit!
- The good guys and the bad guys were on the back of the boat and I swear I only turned my back for a MINUTE but when I came back, they'd killed Mozart.
- You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
- Today will be difficult. But tomorrow, good riding.
- I may be lying in the gutter, but I am looking up at the stars
- It was something that sang out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
- There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
- Her self image was not the force field she imagined it to be
- LGBT issues need to be discussed in class
- Most adults forget what it was like to be a child once they hit a certain age
- What do you want to be when you grow up?
- And it's one more good thing that will never be again
- Boy, I was sure lucky to be born into the one true faith!
- all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well
- This wasn't how it was supposed to be
- as X as I Need to Be
- I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
- I want it to be more like the things I write
- A child who will clearly grow up to be as demented as me
- There has to be a better way to make human beings
- There is some place I need to be
- There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
- I Would Be Content To Live For But A Day
- When I stop going there, I will be well.
- I am Human, and I Need to be Loved.
- Ain't what I'm gonna be, ain't what I wanna be, but lord thank you I ain't what I used to be.
- I know I'm not very good at this. I don't want to be better.
- If I was the ocean, what would you be to me?
- RIT was supposed to be built in New Mexico
- I ought to be grateful, but instead I'm angry
- There should be laws requiring electric cars to make the Jetsons flying car noise
- Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it
- Wouldn't it suck to be God's mom and not even get laid in the deal?
- I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
- They try to be quiet but you know they are there with their weird coppery breath.
- What it takes to be a good programmer
- On two concert, I'm shootive collective photo but small, fat, bald headed technologist be insane
- Starving in the greenhouse
- I want to be a sherpa when I grow up
- How to be a geek
- Could you be any more of a poseur? 'Changes' was a best-of!
- Too good to be true
- It is not good that the man should be alone
- The zombie revolution will not be televised. But it will be tweeted.
- Smile! It's good to be irritating once in a while
- Pirates and ninjas: why they should be friends but can't be
- We Regret to Inform You That Tomorrow We Will Be Killed with Our Families
- be good to each other
- Your heart may be broken, but the world still rotates my dear friend
- what I thought was going to be a turtleneck turned out to be a dickey
- He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
- makes me want to be a better hacker
- But, my dear sir, if you educate them, they will no longer be Baptists
- To be this good will take Sega ages
- If I was a woman I'd be a feminist too
- I want to be a whale when I grow up. Or a squid.
- Where's the kaboom?
- You touched me when I needed to be touched, and for that I will hold you in my heart forever
- I want to be alone until God rips a rib out of my chest and makes me a woman
- I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
- The Be Good Tanyas
- How To Be Good
- I have good reason to be thirsty today
- He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
- Art is whatever makes you proud to be human.
- You know it is going to be a strange day when you wake up dead
- Hot pursuit
- Being a good lab partner and dealing with a bad lab partner
- There need to be better terms in English for "significant others"
- I come home, she lifted up her wings. I guess that this must be the place.
- Evil be thou my good
- you make my life a little harder than it has to be
- this was supposed to be a parable about the power of the imagination
- when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
- If love was a circus, you'd be a clown
- "Life" appears to be a zero-sum structure, but we're running the numbers again
- Life must be lived forward, but it can only be appreciated sideways
- She was too beautiful to be human
- The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
- Short can be good! (document)
- No. 43: How Not To Be a Geek
- I need to be busy, dammit!
- but you should be right here, right next to me
- Then the walls started to bleed again and I just KNEW I'd be the one cleaning it up.
- Things that seem too good to be true rule
- Well if it's gonna be THAT kinda party, then I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!
- words I've wanted to tell you but never seem to be able to
- let the memories be good for those who stay
- It will be good when I am leader
- People tell us who they are, but we ignore it, because we want them to be who we want them to be.
- If we classified ducks as monsters, well, that would be pretty accurate.
- I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee
- If poetry could describe the way you make me feel, poetry would be illegal. Or anyway I might get arrested.
- If all you did was node, your writeups wouldn't be very interesting, would they?
- well, I'll be jiggered
- God can't be all good and all powerful at the same time
- Why people who get the wrong number make it out to be your fault
- If this was an Olympic Sport, I'd be world champion
- Exes can be good things
- You may be a noder, but you ain't no dancer
- if I can't be with you, then I'll write about you, or I'll write about something else
- Everything seems to be up in the air at this time.
- Why wiring your own phone line might not be a good idea
- good reasons to be content
- Sometimes it's hard to be good
- How to approach a developer who may well be working and ask him a question
- I'm gonna be sad and then I want you to make me laugh
- I may be a trenchie bitch, but you forget we wear combat boots!
- Heterosexist norms make it tough for gays to be themselves
- Damn it feels good to be a nurturing male
- I may be young, but I'm not naive
- That I Would Be Good
- If a given feature can't be found in a Freeware application, you don't need it
- It is not our noise at all, but we are lucky to be listening
- How to be a moron in any city but Baltimore
- A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true
- The moment you realize you can't be good at everything
- If God was willing to let it be
- I was Dan for fifteen minutes and I never want to be Dan again
- Every poem is a silence that needed to be broken
- TV can be a good thing
- He may be a son-of-a-bitch, but he is our son-of-a-bitch
- Tears must be shed to make room for the laughter
- If you meet a strange, confident woman, she may well be a witch
- Spikey the Werm may be a Werm, but he's got quite an imagination nonetheless!
- Your first writeup will be nuked: Don't give up
- How to be a good evil villain
- When I grow up (I want to be an old woman)
- One need not be a chamber to be haunted
- I don't want to be a weeping mass of emotion, but I am
- It ought to be broad daylight, but the shadow that envelops the story shows no signs of brightening
- A Man Needs To be Told
- Mother, did it need to be so high?
- We couldn't be anywhere else but here
- His love was enormous; it cleared rooms that desperately wanted to be full.
- When I grow up, I want to be a pretzelman
- I set the alarm clock anyway, knowing I would be up all night
- Be your own fiction. After that, the story almost writes itself.
- I will make your oppressors eat their own flesh and they shall be drunk with their own blood like wine
- Not to die but to be reborn...
- The music makes one's blood boil and long to be in some obscure, untamed place with the one you love
- How to be a good customer
- Freedom is free of the need to be free
- got to be good looking cause he's so hard to see
- There need to be more powers
- All we need is just to be
- Maybe tomorrow we’ll be on that plane.
- the space where you are needs your help to be empty again
- Your first relationship will be nuked: Don't give up
- English may be a "living language," but Latin is not -- so get it right.
- How to be a good motorcycle passenger
- I'm Rudy Giuliani! I was mayor of New York on 9/11! I Should Be The President!
- To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring - it was peace.
- Don't be sad, I'll make you happy
- There's got to be a way to make it sweeter, a little more like lemon meringue
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