The primary justification for any action, government, corporate, or political, in the post-9/11 United States. On Sepember 12, 2001, New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani informed me through a press conference that it was my duty as a New Yorker and an American to return to work the next day. Why? Because if we all took the rest of the week off (the major exchanges were all closed for the rest of the week, by the way), then the terrorists would have won.

This lame and ultimately manipulative reasoning is used in nearly every facet of policy-making. If we change foreign policy, then the terrorists win. If we raise taxes to pay for a $60 billion bombing campaign, then the terrorists win. Those guys win pretty easily.

On a lighter note, this is a good excuse to use to avoid doing things you don't want to do.

    Person 1: Hey, can I borrow your car tonight?
    Person 2: No.
    Person 1: Why not? You have three, and you never drive any of them!
    Person 2: If I change my driving habits, then the terrorists win.

I would like to be informed as to what can be done to make the terrorists lose.

It recently occurred to me that perhaps, in TerroristLand, the terrorists have the same idea about us (we being freedom-loving folk). Does Terrorist #30893 believe that if he chooses not to put on the fake dynamite and carry his plastic AK-47 to the Terrorism Parade, then Uncle Sam and the Forces of Right, Goodness, and Christian Morality will win?

    Example (somewhere outside Baghdad):
    Generic Bearded Terrorist: Hey Generic Clean-shaven Terrorist, up for a night of shouting at the plastic pagan idol of the neo-imperialist fascist Zionist-controlled occupiers?
    Clean-shaven Terrorist: No way, I just ordered a pizza and I think I might be able to make out some cleavage on the satellite feed.
    Generic Bearded Terrorist: My beardless friend, if you don't use every moment of your spare time to protest against in a manner that overtly promises violence, then the brave soldiers of the 4th Infantry Division and other units across Muslim lands have already won!
    Generic Clean-shaven Terrorist: You're right, Michael. Give me that assault rifle.

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