Disclaimer: Warning: bullshit; Don’t read this.


"Music? What the FUCK is music?"

Well?
What?

No, really,
What is this stuff; Music?

Let’s think source, mechanism, and destination. Not necessarily in that order. Us. We hear it. We like it. We make it. Make what? Sound. Periodic reverberations of our gaseous medium? More then that… rhythmic, organized. Sequences and repetition. Coming from: People. Things. Machines. Machines with people on them.

Still... The Fuck?

I mean, I like sequences and repetitions as much as the next guy,
But I *like* music.
Ew.
What. I hear but I do not see.

Why do we like it? Us, that is. Music, that was. Music that is, and the us that was, rather. What did they do to grow so together? And spare the bullshit. I want real meaning, real evolutionary, evidentiary backup. I ask for practicality. Analytic repeatability and a firm foundation in memetics. On this, the stuff we listen to, and why?

I’ll start it. You finish it.

A thing is good because it provides:
a) Value.
b) Perceived value.

That is, it helps us live, boink, or protect our fellow humans (in the applicable order of priority, of course). Or maybe it just makes us think it does. Deep down ‘dere. (Funny joke.)

A thing is music. Music provides:
a) Value: Dunno. Fill in the blanks? Lets check the news. Hm. Does Mozart make baby big heap smarter? Help me out here.
b) Perceived Value: Ah. An opportunity for obfuscation. What PRIMAL desires does music confuse? This pirate to our instincts, is it pirate by instinct or design? Let’s me throw out some theory.

You: Expand. Refute. Diversify? Simplify.
Float the thesis. Provide antithesis. Reach synthesis.

What’s music again? Ah, yes. Rythym.

Patterns. We *like* patterns. Symbolism, Classification. Technique, development and repetition thereof. These, rather then being INTELLECTUAL, are IMHFact the core of human emotionality.

The mind is based on symbols; creating, cognizing, and recognizing. We act based on how we classify things. We eat chips, or we eat glass, not because of what they are, but because of classifications, instinctive and developmental. What could more fundamental be? The monkey inside sees, hears patterns, and is happy. Positive feedback.

But:
But what? Ah, yes. Why? Symbols are nice. Patterns are nice. But to be truly, inexorably, 'sweet', they have to be good. They have to either BE or BE ASSOCIATED with things that are, well, phun. Or scary. Or profound. Or epiphanatious. So what things does music associate with? Which mechanisms does it coldly, callously compromise?

Let’s talk about vocals, now: If we hear a voice, we’re not alone? Alone is bad? Is it of the opposite sex? Why are musicians sex symbols? What’s a sex symbol? Where can I get one? But, anyhoo, The Music? The Voice? The voice is singing. Shouting, maybe? Can you hear it? Is it telling you what to do? I don’t know.

What about Beat? Pop. Techno. Tribal. Again with the bing, the bang, the boom.

What could we associate this with?
Heartbeat? The WOMB?
Sex, maybe? Rhythmic. But that rhythmic? Dunno. Music… The Fuck? You tell me.

I’m going to stop now. Tired. You could cut me down if I’d left you anything to cut. Understand and Goodnight.