Oh god. I hate myself.
I wish I could say that this is one of those moments, moments when you feel that you're such a terrible person and that you've mistreated everyone around you and abused their trust and friendship.
Well, maybe it is. But I feel those moments often enough to be able to tell the difference between them, and the realisation I've come to now.
I suppose it could be said that I only feel this way because I've had a bad day, or some bollocks like that. And I have. Today, I've managed to severely annoy almost everyone who matters to me, and quite a lot of those who don't. Some of it's been building up for a while, straining to the point whereby nasty things which I hardly even notice doing anymore start to crack relations with people. I can dimly remember that once, long ago, I was such a nice person. I... was so nice to everyone. Somehow I got corrupted. Certainly not by any outside influence, but by myself, my own conceitedness, building up to the point that I can no longer think of myself as a 'nice person'.
I should have noticed the signs. Even when other people told me, I changed nothing.
I've become such a bastard.