Those
bastard Antarcticans! I am so freakin sick of their
holier than thou attitudes... "Oh, how're your huge chunks of floating ice today? What? You don't
have any huge chunks of floating ice? What about your
mars meteors? What, you don't have any of those, either? My God, I feel so BAD for you!"
Yeah? Well up yours, buddy! It's time we put them in their rightful place. We've already burned through their share of the ozone, but they still keep coming! We need to do more! I call for firebombings, guerilla tactics, and Robotic Death Ninjas of our own to combat the Antarctican threat. Even now, Antarcticans, who look exactly like us except for their demonic furry parkas and sinister ice-covered beards, are infiltrating our American and European communities. They take our jobs, spoil our childrens' minds with their evil Antarctican propaganda, and destroy our ecosystem by shipping in millions of penguins a day to warmer climates where they have no natural predators. How many times have you nearly wrecked your car trying not to hit gangs of rowdy penguins loitering in the road?
I say this has gone far enough! I call for a full scale invasion of subjugation of Antarctica and all its peoples and wildlife. We'll show those bastards who's really in charge around here! Down with the icies! Down with Antarctica!