* As stated in HOT DAMN! An E2 gathering in Ohio?!?!!, I was quite nervous about meeting “Internet people.” Keep that in mind as you read this.
Friday –
I get to a late start and then hit mega-traffic. When I check into heart break hotel the Cross Country Inn, I see something odd; this hotel has a drive-through check-in. I really hoped I would get fries with my room, but since they didn’t even make my room up, I don’t want to ask too much.
The plan is for Ccunning to come to the hotel and bring me to Zot’s. I call over to Bart’s house and tell him where I am and that I need to speak to Chad. When Chad picks up the phone we talk for a few minutes and then he asks where I am. I tell him that I am near his apartment… the mocking that proceeded made me realize that I was not talking to Chad, but Ted instead. After my long trip, I was not amused.
* I want to go home. I am now completely scared of these people.
Sane Guy and Ccunning arrive five minutes later in Ccunning’s pimp-mobile. I am on the telephone with my mother. Mom and I are very close and she was very nervous about me meeting “Internet people.” I am telling her how great everyone is and how much fun I am having – I had yet to meet anyone. I was worried about what impression this was going to give the guys, but they thought it was hilarious.
*I feel a little more relaxed because Chad and Matt are both nice and pretty decent looking guys… not scrawny and dark psychokillers.
As we arrived at Zot’s, I walked onto the porch. I had people all around me, so I did a complete 360, shaking hands. Whom had I just met? I couldn’t tell you. It was a big blur.
*The next bit felt like I was in a pool with thousands of hands feeling me. I was happy, yet overwhelmed.
We went to the park and I played Frisbee for the first time. The noders started killing the tree to get their toys back.
*I cringed and felt the pain of the tree. If they were not so funny doing this, I may have cried for the tree.
In the evening we went to Outlands which was only 4 blocks away. Let me just tell you, scary stuff. If I did not have Tandex and Brainwave, I would have been really scared. I tend to be a little bit of “an uptown girl.” I have happy hour at the Old Library Restaurant with friends on Fridays. To say this was my first time and a Goth club, would not correctly explain my experience to you. I had not even realized that there are clubs where you paid people to beat and electrocute you (in public). I continually grabbed Dan’s hand and when I went from one place to another in the club. I wanted to be viewed as taken. If anyone there hit on me, as they did Chad, I would have been very intimidated.
Two noders got the electric treatment and one non-noder in our group got the beating. I was interested in this, yet scared. As I watched J.R. squirming like a schoolgirl, I couldn’t figure out why he would do this, especially in front of people that he had just met.
* What have I gotten myself into?
To escape this beating and electrocuting circus, I had brainwave take me back onto the dance floor. Suddenly there was this guy in black latex pants, with dread locks checking brainwave out. I immediately felt the need to protect him, so we danced a bit closer. He is quite a good dancer, if I may say. I suddenly felt much safer and had forgotten that an hour ago, a woman in 4 inch stiletto heels and a short plastic looking dress grabbed my ass.
*I am starting to feel a bit more comfortable now that I found a comfort person. I start to hiccup on the way home and Brainwave is kind enough to wait for me.
The rest of the evening is a blur. I had an extra bed in my drive though, check in hotel, so my new friend Brainwave joined me. We were up talking until a bit after 5am.
*Before I went to sleep, I say a prayer in thanksgiving for meeting some really cool people. (If I only knew what Saturday would bring.)
Saturday –
On Saturday, we slept in. Housekeeping comes by and I am in nothing but my towel. I ask him to come back in a half-hour twice through the door, but this man speaks little to no English. I run into the bathroom (although, I was fully covered, I am embarrassed easily) and Dan asks him to come back in a half-hour. The man says “no.” Asshole. Before we leave for breakfast at Bob Evans, I call the front desk and ask for our room to be made up. I explain that I was not dressed when the man came and what happened. She says, no problem. She will take care of it.
After our delightful breakfast with our wonderful waitress, Jamie, we return to the room. Is it made up? No. But I’m sure it will be when we get home. Return to Bartley Day’s house.
When we arrive at the house, only three people remain. Everyone else went to the novelty store to buy balloons and monkees. When they return, we go to the park. There, BAR lets me sit on his jacket so I don’t get my pants dirty. He and his girlfriend, aphexious, are sweet people. I get to know Laurel, Cliff, Chihuahua Grub, Katyana and Dizzy a little better.
* I cannot believe how cool everyone is turning out to be! Wow! I am having a really good time!!!
Then, someone walks up to me with an oversized yellow balloon. I just look at him as he throws it at my face. I am in complete in total shock because I don’t remember meeting this guy… just vaguely seeing him. I feel dumb for not blocking the balloon and get ditzy. I tend to get ditzy when I feel way out of my element. I trust people too much. I did not expect this stranger to throw the balloon at my face. Now, in retrospect, I realize that this guy is someone I have been chatting with for quite a while. That is why he took such liberty with me. Had I realized it was him at the time, I would of gotten up and kicked his ass, like he deserved. However, I go on being polite instead.
In the evening I change into my “look at my ass” pants (since Rosie had her leather booty pants on). I drink way too much and flirt with way too many people. From this, I discovered that Medieval is a complete and total gentleman. Because of my impaired state, I was leaning over exposing myself, unbeknownst to me. He nicely pointed this out so I could stop from any further embarrassment.
I also got backrubs from several sweet gentlemen. Let me just say, Zot gives phenomenal backrubs and makes fondue! He is in line to be my new cabana boy.
Below are my drunken realizations:
Brainwave and I went back to our unmaid rooms and crashed. I will kill housekeeping in the morning.
Sunday –
Sunday morning, I am ill. Very ill. I didn’t know I had that much in my stomach ill. I haven’t drunken that much since I turned 21. Damn, it was fun.
We arrive at the house to help clean up and Bart tells us he will wait until September to do that. We all take a group picture. Someone mentions breakfast. I have been drinking a lot of water, so I feel up to this. It’s only a little bit down the road, I am told. We have reservations at 2pm, I can easily be on the road by 3pm – 4pm at the latest. I am supposed to be in Cleveland, meeting a friend who I haven’t seen in five years, at 5pm. This shouldn’t be a problem.
I am in the caravan of doom. We get lost. I don’t care. I love spending time with these people. We eat. We hug. We leave. At 5:30 I depart on my marry way.
In reflection, I have * NEVER * in my entire life, had such a good time as I did that weekend. I have made some really strong bonds. I hope to see brainwave again soon. I am flying out to see pyrogenic next week. I can’t wait to see Dana and Anthony again.
*I came with 5 bottles of hard alcohol, 30 beers and 3 batches of cookies, I left with 37 friends. Pretty fair exchange if you ask me.
Going to your first E2 Gathering is a lot like my first sexual experience:
It was less scary that I thought it would be.
It was bigger than I ever imagined.
It was not at all what I expected.
It was a little painful in the beginning, but better than anything else by the end.
There was lots of hugging in the end.
I want more.
A true and sincere thank you to goes to everyone from HOT DAMN. This especially goes to Bart. There was not one person there, who I did not like, respect and love on some level.