I hate writing daylogs about myself, but I feel the need to. At 12:35pm EST my niece was born in Columbus, Ohio. Upon announcing this to #e I recieved many notes of congrats and such, and I think the overall happiness of the room went up 2 points. But how come I'm not excited about this?

I was really happy when my nephew was born 3 years ago last September. While the pregnancy wasn't planned, and it gave my father a major headache, we were happy. My brother got married to his long-time girlfriend and mother of the child in November of that year, in Vegas, at the Treasure Island Casino, on the British Boat. The british boat also happens to be the one that sinks in their little stage performance. All of us at the wedding joked how we hoped that this wasn't a sign. I think we jinxed them.

I can't really say what's going on at this moment. Not because I don't want to share with my noder brothers and sisters, it's that I have no clue as to what's going on. She has 2 kids, wants to go to law school, even though she already has 2 degrees, and doesn't want to leave Ohio. He graduated from USC last year and is working out in LA right now as an architect, the one place she's adamant about not living. They can't see eye to eye.

How can I be happy about this new life when there's so much in the air involving the parents? While I'm sure that little Sophia is going to grow up happy, with a good life, I just hope it involves her father, my brother.

In my world, I'm less than 5 months away from proposing to my girlfriend. I can see how my brother's marriage is effecting my future one already. I can see the questions in my parents eyes as I continue to love another blonde Ohio girl. I just wish I could get more of an answer from my brother than "things are fine" when I know they aren't.

Obla-dee, Obla-da, Life goes on