Layers. It's all about the layers.
Lesbian Robot Vampires : The Play
Harry: So check it out. There's this website called
Everything 2.
(Turns to audience) www dot... are you writing this down? ... everything 2 dot com.
(Turns back to Jeremy)
Jeremy: Fascinating. and you are?
Harry: Jeremy.
Jeremy: Harry.
They shake hands.
Harry: Nice to meet you.
Jeremy: Likewise. You were saying?
Harry: On this website, they asked us to write a play that can be executed in 60 seconds. (To audience) Of course, by "US" I mean the author of the play. He should have referred to himself in the 3rd person, but hey, he wrote the play and I just say what he tells me to. By the way, I'm a cross-dressing pansy.
Jeremy looks at Harry in disbelief for a second and then makes a 'please continue' motion with his hand.
Jeremy: Moving swiftly forward.....
Harry: (To Jeremy): Anyway.... this guy who calls himself Footprints wrote this play just to advertise a story of his called Lesbian Robot Vampires : The Case of the Radioactive Cat.
Jeremy: What do you mean "THIS PLAY?!" We're just actors in a play?
Harry: Yup.
Jeremy: But I can't act!
Harry: I noticed.
Jeremy: Bloody hell. And we're just here to advertise that story to this audience?
Harry: Actually, I think he just wrote this just for the people who read it on the website.
Jeremy: So he never actually meant for this play to be acted out?
Harry: I don't think so.
Jeremy: Bloody hell.
Jeremy shakes his head in disbelief and they begin to walk offstage.
Jeremy: (Mutters) Bastard!
Exeunt, chased by a pack of rabid werewolves
Harry returns
Harry: (To audience) Seriously though - go read it.
Exit, chased by his own ghost
Of course, the above play will most likely not be acted out as it incorporates E2 prominently. Therefore I have written another play which, although it has fewer layers, still brings home the point of the actor acting in a play in which he doesn't know that he is acting. And it's still all about the layers. And a bit about the lasers. But mostly about the layers.
Gone in Sixty Seconds 2005 - Theatre Quest Entry
Victor is standing in the middle of the stage. Hector walks onto the stage from the right holding a two-page script.
Hector: Yo, Victor, check this out.
Victor: What is it?
Hector shows the script to Victor, and they both look at it.
Hector: It's a script for one of the plays today.
Victor: Is it any good?
Hector: I don't know. Do you want to read a bit?
Victor: Sure. Let's see - You read Hector and I'll read Victor.
Hector: Okay. You stay there. I have to enter from the right.
Hector goes off stage (to the right) and comes back on.
Hector: Yo, Victor, check this out.
Victor: What is it?
Hector shows the script to Victor, and they both look at it.
Hector: It's a script for one of the plays today.
Victor: Is it any good?
Hector: I don't know. Do you want to read a bit?
Victor: Sure. Let's see - You read Hector and I'll read Victor.
Victor looks up at Hector.
Victor: Is that it?
Hector: No, there's a bit more over the page.
Hector flips over the page.
Victor: Is that it?
Hector: That's it.
Victor: It's not very good.
Hector: Maybe you just don't get it. Maybe if the actors are really good, it'll be a really good play.
Victor: What, with an ending like that? No self-respecting actor will ever act in that play.
Hector looks up from the script
Hector: That's it.
Victor: It's not very good.
Hector: Maybe you just don't get it. Maybe if the actors are really good, it'll be a really good play.
Victor: What, with an ending like this? No self-respecting actor will ever... aw crap.
Curtain falls