Okay, let us see how flat
orange soda,
tears of
rage, and
NIN goes together whilst typing. Two more days of
working a
job I utterly detest, eight days more in this hell. They say
war is
hell, well, perhaps
long goodbyes are a friggin close second. I find myself wondering why no one is spending any
time with me before I go, I think the few people I had close to me are finially sick of me being around...well, not too much longer people. The things that are really bothering me is the fact that I cannot
quantify what I achieved on this two year trip here. I'm leaving with little more than what I came with, the
ghosts I brought here have been replaced with fresh and angry
demons.
Was it all a waste? Were the countless hours of mental torture I put -myself- through all for nothing? Of course we learn from
experiences, but what did I
teach? I keep waiting to be pleasantly surprised, being able to say
"Oh my, you didn't have to do that..." but I don't think anything is coming. Just the
coldness I long for, so out of place in this
heat.
At least one thing is interesting. There's this girl I've been eying the past few weeks, a screenplay writer that I went to Ybor with a week or so ago. Saw her last night briefly at the coffee bar..walked in to the sight of her blasting away with two guns on Area 51. My god there is something sexy about a classy chick with guns. Sauntered over and told her so, recieved a grin and a gun for my very own. We played a bit, then sat down to talk.
Due slightly to the fact that I still owe her $20, of which she has politely said nothing of, I asked her out for Friday night. She quickly accepted, then mentioned she had something to do Saturday, and she couldn't decide. I asked her what the choice was. She turned to very calmly and said;
"Well, first of all, you know I'm Scientoligist, right?"
I pause. "Ah, a scienta?" she looks at me puzzled.
"That's what the locals call you guys" I finished.
Amazingly, the conversation proceeds smoothly, and I manage
to learn a little about it without pissing her off. Personally, and I shared this with her, I think it's all a bit misleading, the way they present themselves. So I'm invited to an Auditing session this Saturday evening. May as well see firsthand before I judge them anymore. I'm not worried, I'm not the following type. Just killing time till I get outta here.