A weekend of opportunities that couldn't all fit in my pocket.
Is it too late? I don't want to miss any more opportunities. I would still like to give you my thoughts. I still need to tell the Hot Damn congregation how I want to eat them all like pudding. Allow me to
debrief:
It did
rain for forty days and forty nights.
The Great Northern Convoy packed up their respective arks and traveled south. The Holland contingent took up the lead, which I thought silly since I had been to our
Ohiorific destination before.
I started talking to Bart a while ago. We bonded over crispy apartments, and my work kept sending me near Columbus. Just before my second trip there I asked in channel if anyone lived there and could recommend fun stuff. As it turns out Zot-fot-piQ lives in the heart of, and has his finger on the pulse of Columbus. Furthermore, he makes a mean fondue. And you should all sample Sane guy's godiva cake.. But, I digress.
The smells of fonduetastic memories
lead me astray from my convoy. The other two thirds of our convoy missed an entire expressway. As it turns out
Bones is a follower. He wanted to get on the correct expressway, but decided to follow
the gilded frame instead.
Ok. So I couldn't find the hotel, but my keen noder sniffing ability lead
my new noder husband Dizzy, Void_ptr and myself straight to the porch.
THE PORCH was an intimidating place to arrive. There were
noders a plenty, and I only recognized a few from my
stalker like investigative picture seeking abilities.
I have a
communications degree so I went on a manic handshaking spree and instantly forgot all the names save 3. I never did get much of a chance to talk to those 3. I regret missing that opportunity. I took this journey to meet new friends. There were a few I was eager to size up. They seemed
larger than life names with almost superhuman writing abilities.
I wanted to make them more real, more flawed, more human. Much to my delight, they were all indescribably wonderful. They were
everything I wished I could be. Not only could they write, but also they can sing, and dance, and juggle, and draw, and maintain stimulating conversations for 3 days straight.
Noders never fail to impress me.
It wasn't long before the other two thirds of the great northern convoy arrived. Suddenly there were
gods standing on the porch. I think I actually saw some
bowing. Sure
Dem_bones is one charming and impressive mother fucker, but try calling him
boner. It will help you get over it too. My clique had arrived. I regret relying on them for support as much as I did. People were incredibly nice to me, and nary one
masturbation nor
tub joke was made. I wish I had cut the
umbilical cord from my convoy. I exchanged
witty banter here and there with the occasional
ultra cool noder, but never went for a walk down the tracks with
Phylis Stein, and
JP. I didn't sit on the stairs and talk about
Oscar Wilde, or
Kurt Vonnegut with
Chihuahua Grub.
The event was bigger than myself, and I was lucky to remember more than 20 names, and marvel over
ccunnings velvety apparel while I could.
What I really came for was the dancing. I only got to dance with
zfp for a few seconds at
my wedding. He promised to
swing dance with me if I came.
If you swing dance, she will come. I was about 3 drinks of whatever into the evening
(thanks to whomever supplied the liquor I was drinking) when some
Brian Setzer Orchestra tune started to wail. I collided with Bart in the dining room. I think I may have stolen this first dance from
Ideath, however, I am glad I did.
This was secretly my favorite part of the entire trip.
Bartley Day sure can jump and jive. He threw some kick step, kick step combo at me and
my heart was thrusting through my throat. I then, in turn, stole a moment from
Ideath. She asked me if I lead. So I spun her, and spun her from the
follow position. Thank you both for the dance.
I find joy in my belly when I am dancing. Unfortunately, there were
things other than joy in my belly at the time. I actually took
Dizzy on
the puke walk with me. You know, the walk around the block from the party because you don't want to puke in front of
the cool kids. I felt like I had been through a dryer. My stomach was churning and churning. Thankfully, I didn't
barf, but I certainly didn't feel up to more dancing.
That was the missed opportunity I felt worst about. I really wanted to go to
Outland. I can't begin to recount the numerous stories of Bart's that takes place at Outland. I also love to dance, and wanted to dance with more noders, but my ailing stomach prohibited me. I went back to my hotel feeling bad that I didn't get to play with any of
Bart's friends. Luckily for me, I got a chance in the more quiet hours of
day 2 to get to know
the men behind the stories. I hope it's not too late to thank them for
letting me in. I felt like I got to be part of their clique.
I have liked you all for longer than you have known.
I didn't scamper off to
the Park like the most of the clan did that day. I had the opportunity to enjoy some more
quiet moments with our gracious hosts. I also got to hide my lack of
aerobe throwing ability since the tree captured it long before I made it to the park. I had talked zfp into taking a nap and only regret not taking his shoes off and tucking him in. I went to the bathroom while I could and saw him laying there. He looked tuckered out, but was such a good host he wouldn't even shut his bedroom door. I hope he got some well-deserved rest. I am
flabbergasted at how well he held it all together. I thought
the bathtub jam was a big event. He had some 40 noders flowing around his apartment for 3 days with outliers there for over a week.
Kudos to him. If I could raise a glass of that, what was it, $137 dollar bottle of whiskey, and spill it on the floor for the host who can boast the most roast..or
soy product. Cheers Bart. You did an immaculate job. Remember the
things that matter.
I found my way to this beautiful park filled with
beautiful noders a few of which were mutilating a beautiful tree. I wept for the tree and donned one of its flowers on each fingertip channeling the spirit of the tree to
beg for its mercy. O.k. not really, but the gist was there. Alas,
to no avail. Despite my offers to buy the kids a new aerobe, they continued to beat it mercilessly. I found other ways to entertain myself. Dizzy and I went for a walk with
Becca. We got to hear how her journey brought her here, and I wish her luck in wherever it takes her. She is a good woman and does make a mean cookie. Good thing too. Dizzy and I ate the cookie dough that I whipped up for dinner each night since she provided the
freshly baked variety. That damn
Holiday Inn only had room service until 9pm. Yeah, we stayed in a hotel. We figured
40 people, one bathroom, and
limited floor space; it was worth the extra expense. After all was said and done that was what I
regret the most. I missed the opportunity to see
waking noders. Catching them in
a moment few are privy to seeing. I liked the quiet moments. They are more honest.
Speaking of honesty, my sleeping wouldn't have been quiet. Thanks to the excessive precipitation, I had been quite ill for weeks. My humble apologies to anyone who took home
my germs You will all be thankful I wasn't sleeping
there with you Apparently I snore loudly when I'm sick. I also become revengeful when awoken too early. Props to
ccunning for the best prank of the weekend. We got a 6 am phone call that made me weep for I thought I wouldn't get back to sleep. When I woke again at 9, I thought surely
clampe did it. He's
the kind of guy who shits in his brother's pillowcase. I prank called the papal framed clampe room to avenge my lost sleep. They were already up and sprinting to the last moments of the party. I regret not trading a few more hours of sleep to be there in the morning.
The final morning was beautiful. It's a wonderful phenomenon when 40 strangers all come together for
a few brief turns on the earth, and leave hugging. Even if I never get around to messaging
the Hot Damn group, talking in the
catbox with individuals or even posting this node, there are people I will never forget. It was an honor to meet you all. To those I didn't get the chance to sit on the steps with, I hope there is another day my friends. For those who let me in, thank you. It means a great deal to me.