The problem here doesn't seem to necessarily be fashion trends or outlandish expectations of a woman's size, as dictated by runway models or purchasing trends. If that were the case, why the hell can I never find a pair of jeans in my size (26)? It's not the most common size on the market by any stretch, and yet it takes me hours and several stores to spend the $25 for something attractive to cover my legs, that for once fits.

The problem is that the fashion world caters to a size 8-10. Every size of clothing is graduated up and down from that oh-so-ideal 36-24-36 figure that the fashion industry has deemed proportional. Therefore, if you wear a size 26, your measurements should be 54-42-54. Ouch.

My chest is nowhere near that big, nor are my hips. But because my waist is that size, I am a 26. My clothing is either too tight or too loose; my underwear is too long in the torso or too tight in the legs; my bras are impossible to buy, at a 42B. It seems as though once you top a 38 band size, your breasts are automatically D-cups or more.

But because my waist is that size, I am a 26.

The point here is that unless you're a cookie-cutter body, which is rare and I salute you if you can achieve one, there are going to be clothes out there that don't fit you. Which is why I shop as little as possible.