With hindsight, I was more than blind
Lost without a clue
Thought I was getting carat gold, and what I got
was you
Stuck inside the circumstances, lonely at the top
I've always been an introvert
Happily bleeding.
-Placebo
You call, out of nowhere, just when I remember
you were missing.
The thought of you does nothing for me. Is just a passing
daydream, like so many others that cross my mind.
I feel nothing for you, though you almost make me.
I listen for hours. Your voice is soft and
enchanting. Your words are a pretty
dance that tickle the empty corners of my mind. So close to
blooming with fire, you touch a spot that sparks, but nothing more.
The embers sizzle, then die, once your voice fades.
I do not mean to keep you dancing. To make you think I could really make your
dream come true. You lull me into your wishes. They feel soft and warm, a
blanket gently, easily smothering my true desires.
Your voice, your words, your need for me. They trickle through me like hot
coffee on the coldest of mornings. I feel
appreciated,
comfortable,
content.
Secure.
It is easy to say I could be with you. It would be easy to be with you.
But it isn't right.
I don't want to take
the easy way out.
I don't want to feel content and secure.
I don't want you.
You'll pull me in again. The soothing of your voice will remind me you're good. All is
good.
Until it
fades.
And I, again, know the
truth.
You aren't what I need.
You can't make me happy.
Let me go.