Transcription of a dream log written on September 12, 2016, my twenty-first day in Blue Azimuth.
Kissing boys in dreams—you heard me right—kissing boys in dreams: 2
times now. Second time was last night, technically. Neither of the guys I
kissed were boys: one was a young man and the other one was either an old
teenager or a young man. I don't remember too well.
The first dream was a
week ago (about). Part of that dream was this scene: me, I got drunk—real,
real drunk—and woke up in the bleachers of an Olympic stadium (event? No
clue) still sort of drunk and very anxious because I didn't have a
ticket for the event. If security found out, they'd have me thrown out,
arrested, maybe worse. The consequences, they were ambiguous, but
threatening. As I'm quietly freaking out to myself, wondering how to get
myself out of this pickle, I look up to the sight of a security officer
(blue uniform kind of like the one worn by the nervous cop
guy in Ace Attorney) bearing
down on me, brandishing a baton that looked like one of the metal detector wands
wielded by the TSA, but with the neon orange glow that those guys on the tarmac wave to guide the planes (or whatever) as they taxi, threatening,
clearly moving to arrest. And as this happens, my view swivels around to
the face of this man beckoning, arm out. "Come with me (quick)," he says,
and I agree, I guess, I guess.
And all of a sudden, (cliché phrase (it's
okay, just keep moving)) we're standing next to each other on a balcony
overlooking Paris—the Eiffel Tower. A great many (I wish I had better words)
red, orange, yellow lights; buildings; cars; tiny, glowing, lighted window
squares down below and around. Everywhere: wonderful, glorious. The big city
lights. I don't remember sounds. There was wine, I think. Red wine, maybe. Wine glasses in hand or somewhere, maybe just memories of wine. And I know
that we kissed. I don't think I saw us kiss, but I know that we did, and
then for some reason—maybe something I said—he got displeased, or said,
"Aw man," or "That's unfortunate". Not angry, just disappointed. I saw his face,
then it showed that feeling, and then we parted, and I don't know what
happened.