I was a bit curious as to the contents of the fat package. Someone spent $1.60 on postage ensuring that it got to me, so whatever it was, it would be a humdinger, right?

(rip rip tear)

Hm. "Relief from Pain" Personal Triumph subliminal audio cassettes. My roommates, unaware of Everything's new incarnation as a group therapy forum, gave me strange looks. Surely this was some sort of joke... ah, an attached message. This should clear things up:

Pseudo_Intellectual

THERE'S
MORE
TO
LIFE
THAN
PAIN

THERE'S ALSO FOOD. LA!

Unconvinced by the deadpan delivery, I held out. Perhaps this is clever packaging for a mix tape. Maybe someone has recorded a secret message for me on top of these cassettes.

If it is clever or secret, it has thus far been too clever and secret for my cunning vulpine nature to penetrate. I popped the first tape in my stereo before going to sleep the first night I recieved it, back near the creation date of this node. It seemed straightforward enough, though some of the messages ("I will only spend my time in the company of people who are happy and successful") I found more than a little creepy.

Despite expecting to wake up in the middle of the night bawling, it doesn't seem to have had any discernible effects. There remains nothing more to life than pain, not even food. Well, maybe painful food. And of course the pain of not having enough food. Still, these all fall under the category of pain. THE PAIN WHICH IS THE SOLE CONSTITUANT OF LIFE! Spinoza was right, with a spin. We are all merely modes of attributes of God's constant entropic agony.

If I can figure out what I did with it, perhaps I'll fire up tape two tonight. Thank you, NWC, whoever you are, for injecting a little mystery into an otherwise utterly predictable life 8)