OK.

First, I am not a doctor. I am, however, the husband of a US doctor, and I've seen my wife struggle through four grueling years of medical school, and through three years of an internal medicine residency, and now through a professionally significant but otherwise glory-free year as a chief resident. We have about $90,000 in debts from her medical education, and she has never made more than $40,000 per year. And before you say something about that, let me say that servicing her loans costs about $12,000 per year. After taxes, this leaves her with about $20k of her salary.

OK, now that I've opened my family's fiscal doors to you, let me comment. I would have been content to leave this alone, had all the writeups been simple bad-doctor stories. Hell, everyone gets stuck with a jerk for a doc every now and again, and I know enough MDs personally to testify that, yes, some of them are serious assholes. But I don't think that doctors are proportionally more jerky or assholic than the population at large.

The thing is, when you see a doctor, you're asked to become very vulnerable. Doctors can ask you questions that you'd slap anyone else for asking. This puts people in a weird emotional position. However, today's doc has something like 20 minutes to evaluate your symptoms and come up with a reasonable diagnosis and treatment plan. Pointed questions, whether or not they seem relevant to the patient, are an integral part of this task. If you are not menstruating and you complain about abdnominal pain, you could be pregnant, have a cyst, ovarian cancer, or the like. Even if you come in with a broken ankle, you will get asked these questions--if you have not had your period for a while, your doc may want to give you a pregnancy test before deciding what kind of pain medications to give.

My wife does not demand that you call her "doctor," despite her eight years of professional training. She does hope for (but not always receive), standard courtesy from her patients. I don't mean deference, I mean acting the way you would with anyone you don't really know. Relationships may develop over time, but jumping in and calling someone by their first name without permission is rude (and the doc above, as an intern fresh out of med school, may not have yet learned this lesson).

I will not address in detail the point that the medical profession has not advanced beyond leechcraft, save to say that many Everythingians would be dead now from smallpox, polio, cholera, tuberculosis, or any one of hundreds of ailments that Western medicine can now treat, were it not for the tireless efforts of doctors through the years. We can't cure everything, we can't even treat everything, but--dammit--we are better off medically than ever before. Perhaps another node...

What my wife does do is come home and cry about the tragedy she sees during the day--about the patient a family decided to remove from life support, the young man who discovers that he has testicular cancer, the woman who is in desperate need of psychiatric care but who refuses to seek it. She works 12 hours a day, at least six days a week. There is no glory, no real remuneration--just the knowledge that she went out, did her best, and maybe did a little good.

So what to do if you get a lousy doc? Tell him/her what you want out of a practitioner. If they can't deliver, go to another. That simple. You'd do the same if you had a lousy mechanic, wouldn't you?