So anyway, I was on the phone with Christy 'cause we're still
BFFs even though she's still jealous of me 'cause I'm a total hottie and she got all fat and ugly after she got married and totally only gets macked on by old nasty guys with combovers, and she was all, "Hey Amber?"
And I was all," Yes bitch?" 'cause I was doing my nails and Christy says some stupid shit.
And she was all, "You remember that website where you made all those ugly bitches jealous of you and totally had guys all hot for you and talking about fucking you on the bus--"
And I was all, "Uhh, I don't take buses. If you don't have a car, you better send a limo."
And she was all, "I know, right. But anyway, remember it was the first year we were seniors at Immaculate Heart High, and you just blew everyone away?"
I sucked my teeth, "I remember, bitch. That was that EverythingDamnNerdy times 2 site. I didn't even get any good phone numbers. That was a total waste of my valuable time. "
"Ever miss it?"
"Whatever. Bitch, I never think about that place with their nerds and their writing and their pimples. That's like missing chess club."
And Christy was all, "So when are we going to the club?"
And I was all, "And anyway E2 is all full of losers who don't get laid and just write and shit. Why would I want to back there? They want you to think and be all serious and read. Shit, I finished reading in fifth grade. After that, I just gave blowjobs to pass classes."
And Christy was all, "Earth to Amber? When are we going to the club?"
She can be a real unfocused bitch. So, anyway, I came back to see if any y'all lamers started to get some nookie or lives or anything cool like that. And you're still here. Still writing. You suck