(thing) by WolfDaddy Fri Apr 27 2001 at 5:52:06

WolfDaddy's Practical Guide to Getting Tickets for Madonna's Drowned World Concert Tour

  • Be a geek.
  • Live in Hollywood North
  • Work (or have worked) for a movie producer whose brother and father are (or were) A-list movie stars
  • Ensure that a television and movie studio CEO sits on the producer's company's Board of Directors.
  • Teach CEO how to use his Palm Pilot effectively.
  • Download his address book to your computer, call David Geffen directly and skip the remaining steps Avoid temptation.
  • Have enough chutzpah to ask CEO for an "in".
  • Obtain number for very exclusive ticket "broker".
  • Call broker, marvel at the recording which states, "If this is an emergency please dial ..." and wonder what kind of life people lead wherein the inability to speak to someone right away about concert tickets is considered an emergency.
  • Speak to broker.
  • Drop name.
  • Avoid shaking in voice when asked if you'd like backstage passes with those tickets.
  • Answer question in the affirmative, but with dispassion, like it's an everyday thing.
  • Supply credit card number.
  • Thank broker.
  • Wait until September 9th.
    Well, as it turned out, the date I would have gone to the concert was September 11, 2001. Needless to say, I didn't go, but not because of the attacks on my country. Rather, the ticket prices, even through the broker were four. thousand. dollars. apiece. And that was without all access passes. Sigh

    • I like it!