This is a variation on something that the United States Navy provides to squadrons and other aircraft maintenance facilities in order to clean up large amounts of hazardous materials quickly and safely. It turns out that cat litter, in addition to being good fodder for the back end of your domestic feline is also fairly absorbent with regards to oil and other difficult to clean up after liquids. (Note: I have used these devices twice and found both times that they worked more than effectively.)

Estimated Time to Completion: 2-3 hours depending on detail required.

Required Materials:
-Ten packages knee high athletic tube socks, U.S. shoe size 12-15. (Total quantity: 120 pairs.)
-One sturdy plastic storage box large enough to contain the items listed here in an assembled state.
-Twelve bags "absorbent" cat litter.
-One dustpan and brush set.
-One push broom.
-One shovel.
-One fire extinguisher.
-One pair chemical resistant heavy rubber butyl gloves.
-One pair splash proof industrial safety goggles.
-One chemical resistant rubber smock.
-One pair heavy rubber boots.
-One wide neck funnel.
-Ten pounds of fine (beach) sand.
-Two to four large buckets.
-Two thick tip magic markers, one red and one black in color.
-One plastic face shield.
-Small wheeled cart or dolly capable of carrying plastic storage box when filled.

Safety Note:
-Particularly large spills of noxious chemicals that present a respiratory hazard should not be approached without appropriate air supplied or air purifying protective equipment. OSHA qualifications for the use of said equipment are quite stringent and should be adhered to at all times.
-If you are dealing with a large "lake" (over twenty gallons,) of a hazardous material or if two materials have combined, the appropriate local authorities should be immediately notified. The instructions on how to construct this kit are for a maximum surface area of about 400 square feet and a spill size of 20-25 gallons.

What is this thing?
1. Remove 60 pairs of tube socks from plastic packaging. Begin filling tube socks with cat litter to the point where they are approximately 70-80% full. Tie end off in a tight knot and repeat until supply of socks is exhausted. You should have approximately four bags of cat litter remaining after completion of this step.
2. Using remaining 60 pairs of tube socks, fill with sand to the point where they are approximately 70-80% full. Tie end off in a tight knot and repeat until supply of socks is exhausted.
3. Mark socks containing cat litter with a large "C" in red. Socks containing sand shall be marked with a large "S" in black.
4. Place filled socks, remaining sand and cat litter and all other materials into plastic storage box. Tape shut with duct tape and store in a cool dry place. Wait for the inevitable disaster to occur.

Aww piss, little Jed went done and dumped all that motor oil I was collectin' into my new cement driveway.

1. STOP flow of spilling material.
2. Don appropriate safety equipment.
3. Determine lower end of spill, elevation wise. If liquid is moving downhill, contain downhill leg IMMEDIATELY. Deposit a line of socks in front of the advancing forward line of the spill so that the socks with sand back up the socks containing cat litter. Socks should be laid out perpendicular to the spill front and tamped gently with a foot.
4. Block any drains in area to prevent spilled material from reaching the local sewage system. This is accomplished by building a berm of socks approximately three inches high by four inches wide approximately twenty-four to thirty six inches from the drain. The reason that the berm is located so far from the drain is to enable visual verification that spilled material did not leak past.
5. Begin distributing (liberally) loose cat litter from bags over the spilled material, working from the downhill leg of the spill to the top and initial point of the spill. The ideal depth of cat litter to be distributed is one to two inches, depending on amount of material spilled.
6. Wait approximately fifteen minutes, sweep clean and distribute more cat litter to clean up any residual material.
7. Effect proper disposal of cat litter containing hazardous materials.