The first thing I think of when Derryn Hinch's name is mentioned is his relationship with Australian anonymous rock band TISM.

In 1988, when Hinch was a big gun in the Australian media, TISM wrote the song The Penis is Mightier than the Sword for their album Great Truckin' Songs of the Renaissance. It went a little something like:

There's violence on the television
And letter bombs in the mail:
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

Famine eats up children;
The peace talks always fail:
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

You might have double malaria - 
Doctors see you and go pale:
But things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

Christ Himself on the cross
Told the guy banging in the nail:
"Mate, things can't be all that bad
'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail.

I can put up with Ronald Reagan
I can put up with Micham Begin
I can put up with tetraplegia
I can put up with total amnesia
I can put up with black spiky hair
I can put up with germ warfare
I can put up with Chasers and Inflation
I can put up with hyperventilation
I can put up with bowel dysfunction
I can put up with nuclear destruction
I can put up with Mike Willesse - well, at a pinch:
But one thing I can not put up with is Derryn fucking Hinch.

It attacked his sensationalist, over-opinionated, tabloid-like, ratings-hungry journalistic style. HINCH is the predecessor for some of Australia's "current affairs" programs, such as Today Tonight and A Current Affair. These shows are more general interest than current affairs. "'Cos Derryn Hinch went to jail" refers to Hinch's twelve day stay in a prison for contempt of court. He revealed to the public the name of a convicted child molester.

Hinch recorded his own response to TISM's lyrics, and TISM put it on their latest album, De Riguermortis.

There's hip-hop stars like Eminem with lyrics that are sick
He's violent, crass and bigoted, sounds like Stan Zemanick
You are hearing now the first and best voice of the outraged male
But things can't be all that bad when TISM's album fails

I do what Phillip Adams did, if things get beyond the pale
I'll go on Radio National and save the freaking whales
You think my ratings ain't so good - you should see their record sales
Things can't be all that bad when TISM's album fails

The TV Show it got the chop, the film script ain't got made
The wine bizzo went belly up. I even worked in Adelaide
I thought I told you once before the cheque is in the mail
But things can't be all that bad when TISM's album fails

Now, I'm not a vindictive man, ain't got one vengeful pore
I could be damned to time in hell or with Stuart Littlemore
Steve Price could become dictator while Australia Sieg Heils
But things wouldn't be all that bad if TISM's album fails 

Of Derryn Hinch, TISM member Ron Hitler-Barassi says " It's always disappointing to meet the people you don't like and find out they're nice."

Hinch also starred in the movie The Wog Boy (2000), where his journalistic "style" was mocked. When Nick Giannopoulos' character is being interviewed by Hinch, Hinch constantly skews the story to make Giannopoulos look like a crook, a dole bludger and the enemy of the aussie battler (who, funnily enough, would have comprised a large proportion of Hinch's television audience when he was in the business). Throughout the interview, the audience supports Hinch's every twist and turn, following him like sheep.

Hinch was one of the journalists (and i use the term loosely) who contributed to the degradation of news and current affairs coverage on Australian commercial television. Today, there is a tendency to follow the latest trends in weight loss techniques and to uncover shonky builders who are ripping off the Australian public instead of following the real social and political issues facing the world. The only sources for news and current affairs in Australia are the ABC and SBS.


  • http://www.tism.com.au
  • http://www.hinch.net