Ok, ok, I have to admit it, I'm a terrible driver. It's not that I don't try really hard, it's just that at some fundamental level I basically suck at anything that requires my hands and feet to move at the same time. That's why I'm a programmer.

The thing is, I think that nearly everybody sucks this bad at driving, or at least the road sure seems full of clueless tourists gaping at the scenery, hurried corporate drones barking into their cell phones, and teen-age boys more interested in their cd players than the safety and well-being of everybody else on the road. It's a shock that anybody can travel more than two or three blocks without witnessing an accident or being stuck in a traffic jam (caused, undoubtedly by the collision of a pickup truck full of overall wearing Tennesee hillbillys and a 30-year-old blonde corporate barbie^W^W marketing executive with big tits and perfect hair, in a Lexus, screaming into two phones while putting on makeup).

Really, when you think about it, the amazing thing isn't how bad traffic is. The amazing thing is that we ever get anywhere at all.