Happy Birthday to me!
Today I am 18 years old... or young, depending on how you wanna look at things. Today is especially special though, for unlike past birthdays, this one imparts unto me the requisite knowledge and wisdom to manage the hefty responsibilities of porn, cigarettes, lottery tickets, voting, and most important of all, ordering stuff that I see on TV. I have to say though; I don't feel any differently than when I was a mere 17 and 364 days old...
Anyway, I've chosen to look at today as a day of reflection, like an 18 year progress report. I am quickly approaching a large change in my life. High school is only twelve weeks from being over, and college is only twelve more weeks more from starting. As much as I hate to say it, I'm going to miss high school. I've just gotten to the point where I feel comfortable in that environment, where I've formed relationships with some teachers, and even call some of them friends. But most importantly, I still don't have a girlfriend. Ever since middle school, I've made it a goal to prove to myself that someone out there of the opposite sex wants to be around me, and could think of me as more than a friend. In middle school though, I could safely procrastinate when it came to finding someone who would go out with me, because I would see most of the girls I was interested in for another four years in high school. Then, with slightly less confidence, I could procrastinate finding a girlfriend each year of high school, because I still had a little more time to improve my social standing. But as my high school career is waning, I am finding a significant decline in the comfort I get from my ritualistic procrastination. To top all that off, I'll be moving away from home next year. Not that I won't be able to handle it, but I'm gonna miss some of the things that have become part of my routine. Eating my mom's cooking nearly every meal, watching episode upon episode of The X-Files and Babylon 5 with my dad... but most of all, I think I'm gonna miss my friends. These are people that I've known for nearly eight years of my life (some more, some less), that I've seen nearly every day. I'm not against meeting new people, but I hate phasing people out of my life. I'm not against change, but I like to have some control over how much is changed at a time...
Just last night I finished watching all 26 episodes of Cowboy Bebop for what must have been my fifth time. I can't get enough of that series. Every episode holds a different memory, and makes me think: "what have I lost, what am I running away from, what are my actions making me leave behind?" I have a little tradition (albeit really nerdy): after completing Bebop, I'll watch Neon Genesis Evangelion, in it's entirety (again). Every time I watch that series (and accompanying movies) I can't help but be put into a contemplative mood, where I can actually think about some of those questions that I ask myself after watching Bebop. It's a 600+ minute tradition, but when it's all done and over with, I usually walk away with a better sense of understanding of myself... at least for a little while.
To top off the anniversary of my birth, I'm going to put on what will be my last true childhood birthday party. After I decided upon the details of this shindig, I went to the party store for supplies, and was drawn to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles themed party favors. In my youth I loved the TMNT movies, and games, but most of all, the cartoon series, so I couldn't help but purchase the overpriced nostalgia when I saw it. Granted, the stuff I bought was all based on the new TMNT cartoon, which I must say, pales in comparison to the original. I managed to get over that small fact pretty quickly though, and I bought all the stuff needed for the occasion: themed plates, napkins, cups, noise makers, party hats, and just for good measure, a turtle piñata. Plus, each person in attendance will walk away with a goody bag, filled with candy and other useless trinkets that you might remember finding in goody bags when you were young. The party's gonna be a hoot. There's gonna be a Dance Dance Revolution tournament (complete with prizes), tasty food, and best of all, a cake (yum!). This Saturday will serve as a culmination of my childhood, but most of all, as a celebration of all my childhood delights and memories.