Drink Coke Play Again (idea) by enth

DRINK COKE PLAY AGAIN

A message found printed on the vast majority of Coke bottle caps when Coke is running a twist-off-and-win contest. This is the Coca-Cola beverage company's friendly, all caps, no tears way of saying "You are a Loser!"

Also has the connotations of "You've Been a Good Customer" and "You're a Real Gambler Now," to stroke your ego and keep you on good terms with Coke. Of course, it wouldn't really be a message from a modern megacorporation without a little bit of product pushing, so it also means "Buying More Sugar Water Will Make You a Winner."

Quite a bit of information density for a twenty-one character, punctuation free non-sentence, don't you think?

Warning: This Is Not A Step	I just won "ANY BREAKFAST BAGEL SANDWICH" at McDonald's!	Drinking Pepsi will bring your dead ancestors back to life	lather, rinse, repeat
It's illegal to bet money on sporting events, so we will gamble with the lives of innocent children	Buying things just because they have cool packaging	sugar water	Nintendo Vs. Unisystem
ovarian cancer	Coca-Cola and the murder of Colombian trade unionists	information density	Eat popcorn, drink coke
Coca-Cola	DO NOT EAT THE URINAL CAKES	Eight Crazy Nights	You've won... NOTHING!
Ads are the only way to make a technology profitable without the power of nudity	packaging that makes you instantly suspicious	Loser	Pepsi
Coke	The not at all wittily titled end of 2002 London noder meet	soda condom bracelet	The only thing stopping us is the pressure. If your machine can withstand it, we are already on our way.