Wow, I'm so anxious, I've forgotten my headache. I'm sitting in the computing center of the chemistry building, waiting to talk to a prof who maybe will let me work in his lab in September when I stage yet another comeback to the academic world. What my hard knocks have taught me is not to get too hung up on the subject of the research. Shocking but true: most undergrads in the sciences have no idea what they want to be researching! Instead, I should focus on finding a prof who I can get along with. Preferrably two, for those recommendations. Instead, like an idiot I spent most of my acedemic career beating my head against various brick walls. Maybe not this time, though. I will kiss up to profs who like me in the first place. I will work in a lab that wants me working there. I will not work, I will live off my savings and devote all my attention to getting into grad school. I will not let the absurdity of an acutal grad school accepting my pathetic sorry ass discourage me from trying. This long, scary process begins today, right here. Whenever I start thinking defeatist thoughts, I'll sit down, take a deep breath, and separate the valid concerns from the paranoia. I will come up with a plan of action for the valid concerns, and I will make fun of the paranoia in front of my friends until it stops looming. Someday, I will be a scientist. I will discover wonderful things that will help my beloved species and make all of you proud of me. Have a nice day.