Highs and lows. Mostly lows. Low lows. And some highs. Not too high though. Low highs and low lows make for a low, not high, day. Allow yourself a moment to sit back and bask in this statement of the obvious, brought to you by kaytay.

Fell asleep to the sound of mad pen scratchings on index cards as I hurriedly took more and more notes to study for my french exam before the evil sleep devil overtook my pathetic mind. The war was lost, as always, and I was whisked away to dream hell, full of indirect object pronouns and irregular subjuntive verb stems. I woke up with more knowledge than when I fell asleep, however, which leads me to believe hell is a nice place to live.

The exam went well, even if it did cause me to chew myself to pieces with nervousness. I was done half an hour early, with enough time to make it back to high school for some A.P. Statistics. You know I was excited.

My locker wouldn’t open. I had to go out to lunch in the freezing snow without a coat. I am constantly cold even with a coat, hat, scarf, mittens, and several layers of sweaters on. I blame a lack of superfluous body fat. To go out into the elements protected only by a hoodie and a pair of jeans was miserable. But my cramps kept me warm. Not really. They just made me more miserable, despite the thirty seven Advil I had taken.

note: I didn’t really take 37 Advil. Subtract 17, add 9, and divide by 56. Now cross all that out and write “three.” There. That’s how many I really had. Please do not worry about any possible overdoses on my behalf. The prozac prevents that.

I had a splitting headache all day long in addition to severe crampage. Wonderful. Taco Bell was unable to sooth my trouble body parts, so I bought a bagel when Bobby and I returned to school. Bagels make me feel good.

A.P. Psychology was entertaining as always. We leaned what a schema is. I always thought it was a make believe word the cognitive therapists invented to describe my hate for yogurt while I lived in Iowa, but I guess they were telling the truth after all. Education can be enlightening at times. We did a class activity which involved telling a story to one person (who happened to be me), and then having that persron tell it to another person who didn’t hear it the first time, etc. etc. It involved a TWA 747 Bowing plane being high jacked to Cuba and the pilot, Jane, threw a microphone at the person with the gun after the steward, Jack Swanson, brought him to the front of the plane. I recited the story almost word for word to the person after me. She happened to be a little brain dead, and simplified it to something along the lines of “plane, Cuba, gun.” This ruined the experiment. Bitch.

Seventh hour was interesting as well. My group of four performed our play, entitled Quiet Thyself and Die, Wench!” It was a success, mostly due to the impressive soundtrack I had created to accompany the dialogue.

  1. The Last of the Mohicans theme song
  2. RammsteinTier
  3. Phantom of the Opera theme song
  4. The Prodigy - Break and Enter
  5. TMBGIstanbul

The play that was put on after ours was quite a spectacle. The writer of the script completely lost it whenever one of the other actors so much as added a nuance to one syllable that he didn’t approve of. It was extremely frightening – he started banging his head against the wall in frustration at least three times. I can only wonder what would happen if something really bad happened.

Driving home was interesting due to the plethora of snow. There were huge banks along the roads where the plows had deposited the extraneous white stuff. It would have been impossible to go into a ditch without first demolishing a snow bank. Is that safe?

My brother was fired from Pet Supplies Plus five minutes after I dropped him off. He called me when I got back home (another half hour drive) and said he needed me to come pick him back up. But there was a slight problem: the garage door was frozen shut. Nice. My headache picked that time to resurface.

I am now avoiding homework, trying not to fall asleep, and listening to cheesy Christmas music without meaning to.

I need another 37 Advil.