August was a weird month.

The good news is that maybe Delta is slowing down! Though if people travel on Labor Day and Thanksgiving and Christmas, well.

The IT and I were planning to go see the EF and his fiance at Christmas. So far looking unlikely. We can wait.

The IT says that Kindergarten is hard in her school in Denver this year. The little ones have been home with family for 18 months. Usually 3 or 4 kids in a class of 25 cry for their parents. Right now it is the whole 25.

Adverse Childhood Experiences, and right now Adverse Adult Experiences. I talked to my sister outlaw yesterday. She has chronic fatigue and chronic lyme and told me that oxygen and changing my diet is not enough. I should be on various supplements to "enhance my immune system". Oh, I say, I take a multivitamin. She states that it has to be a GOOD multivitamin. I'm sure mine isn't. AND I should be taking vitamin D. Oh, yeah, I say, I take vitamin D. (Sometimes. When that upper left tooth hurts. Mostly I don't.) I don't like pills much. She has no interest in the chronic lyme paper that tests for the antibodies and she dismisses it. "I probably wouldn't understand it." Her son slowed down in classes and will graduate when the EF and fiance get married, April 2022, if that happens. Third time is the charm, right? I hope they can have the wedding. She states that her daughter had her first year of college on line "and that's just not how it's supposed to be. She can't go back and have her first year over. It's just not fair." Guess her name, ha, ha. No, really.

The high ACE score people are going to shine, now. They survived all that childhood trauma and they know how to hunker down and get through it. They will lead us out of the darkness. Eventually people will decide to have a roaring 20s in order to forget all this trauma and then the ACE score people will back away again.

All my old abandonment distrust of people got triggered at the start of the month. I've written poem after poem about it. You are SO SAD that I haven't posted any of them here. Not gonna either, unless I get more then ten downvotes on this. Heh. I realized yesterday that the poems are not about my present relationship really. They are about the very very old ones. Woman, pulling the bandaid off that suppurating wound, ick. The pus that comes out is old black and foul. Anyhow, I am down to clean flesh at the bottom and maybe it will heal now. I should stop poking at it. Doctors are horrible patients. They argue. B said he'd never been at a visit with a doctor patient and her doctor. He said it was VERY DIFFERENT from when he sees a doctor.

Trauma, trauma, trauma. We can get through this. It is dark and hard and everyone is upset and angry, except the people who knit the Mochimochi Land tiny people. They appear to be happy. Let's all escape into Mochimochi Land for a few days.