At my prior place of employment, this syndrome seemed to be particularily insidious. The most disgusting thing about it was that I could clearly detect a competitive edge to it. People bragged about their wives and kids, despite the fact that they were only 23-25 years old and making a mere $11-12 an hour. Personally, I would be embarassed to admit that I was supporting an entire family on such a piddly income. I support my live-in girlfriend on a slightly higher wage now, but I couldn't see myself buying a house and feeding a child until I can do so in a financially comfortable manner. Why anyone younger than 25 would be PROUD of having a kid is beyond me. I guess these geniuses haven't heard that older parents tend to be better parents, and bonus -- THEY LIVE LONGER. It's sensible for purely biological reasons, let alone psychological ones, and I don't mean you should be 50 or 60 years old...but 30-50 is far more reasonable than 20-30. When you've got defenseless living genes to support, your body will maintain itself better.
One particular employee was really awful. He had pictures of his kid plastered all over the place, but none of his wife. I hate to be mean, but he was quite troll-like in appearance and I often wondered if he was embarassed of showing his wife's face around. He had recently been hit by a car and was given $25,000 in "pain and suffering" money, so he blew the entire wad on a Dodge Dakota 4x4 in order to "fit in" with the four wheeler enthusiasts he constantly annoyed on smoke breaks. He bragged openly about buying the truck without mentioning it to his wife whatsoever. His co-workers ridiculed him behind his back, and he worshipped them in pure ignorance. When they revealed their interest in remote control aircraft, he had one the next day.
It seems like people are proud of the fact that they got married early, which is insane to me. I've been with the same person for nearly three years, and am pretty damned sure we're going to get married -- but I'm not going to put my ass on the line and seal the deal with a kid until I can proudly say that I am fully capable of supporting said kid. What's the god damned rush, anyway? I wouldn't be surprised to learn that some of it has to do with organized religion. Marriage gives a couple the right to live together without being ashamed, not that I am. So what do people do? They marry the first "decent" person they meet, so that everyone around them will approve of them shacking up. My parents and my girlfriends' parents have no problem about us living together, but her godparents must be kept in the dark due to their "traditional" upbringing. I have accidentally made it clear to them that we do live together on multiple occasions, when I forget that I'm supposed to lie to them outright.
Although the reception to this writeup has been surprisingly positive, I can see that I've struck a nerve with some people and must attempt to apologize for saying "How can someone be proud of having a kid under 25..." But I'm not going to remove the sentence, because I've seen a ton of wacky opinions (everyone's opinion is fucked up to somebody) on here and wouldn't expect anyone to censor themselves either. I was trying to ridicule those who consider children trophies of accomplishment to brag about at the office, not anyone who has a kid at a young age in general. I think most people who are "proud" have no other choice but to feign pride, so they make it seem like they are better for being in such a situation. The main context of my writeup was my former workplace, where many, many twentysomethings making $12 an hour bragged about their kids despite the fact that they could barely support them. Despite all of their pride, they often admitted that they were completely broke and wished they were single sometimes just to be able to buy things for themselves. My point? Get a fuckin' career first, for Chrissakes.
I just think it's silly to have kids at a young age, proud or not. It's not maturity that bothers me...yes, some people are more mature at 16 than others are at 40. I just happen to be of the opinion that one should have a stable foundation to rest on before spawning a bunch of potential societal leeches. It's very possible to get there by 25, but that doesn't happen with most people most of the time.
If you've got kids and you're under 25, and you're proud, great. Just don't give me any bullshit about how much harder your life is and how much more important every challenge you conquer and decision you make is.
You put yourself in the position, and I think it's a bad position to be in while developing one's future. You can as proud as you want, but I like living comfortably, and my kids and I will be far better off if I wait until I can afford to support them without spending every waking moment of every day away from my family. I'm only 21 and can't see myself ever wanting to have kids, but that will probably change. But why anyone would want to burden themselves with little
parasites at such an early age is beyond me -- especially when they use it as some justification for how much harder they work at life. Why subject yourself to such intense stress at such an early age?
Fuck that noise.
So much for this being a disclaimer, apology, or whatever. It's longer and more potentially offensive than the first portion! Ahh, well. Opinions abound. By the way -- I am a lazy bastard with little ambition... That may have some bearing on why I think it's foolish to subject one's self to stress while building a career. I will admit that perhaps many people work more passionately when they have an immediate need to fulfill. Understandable. I'm just a laid-back, path of least resistance kinda guy, and it angers me when people brag about how difficult they've made life for themselves.
I think I've just realized where most of my bias on this subject comes from. At my apartment complex, many, many, many annoying-as-fucking-all-hell kids swarm like flies all over the place, riding their bikes on the "balcony" (it's contiguous all the way through), skateboarding, riding scooters, screaming bloody murder in the swimming pool, etc. Now I don't hate kids in general, but I do kinda hate uncontrolled, loud, obnoxious kids (but not as much as I hate their idiotic parents). The apartment managers constantly tape fliers to everybody's door warning them to control their kids, as they tend to dart around in the parking lot tempting death on a regular basis. Many near-accidents have occurred.
The swimming pool is the worst. It's kinda right out below where I live, and it seems anybody under 13 has to scream at the top of their lungs 100% of the time they're in that pool. So in return I must blast music to cancel out the effects. Occasionally I scream "shut the hell up" when it gets real bad...and I'm a really shy, unconfrontational person most of the time. On one occasion two kids of at least eight years of age knocked on my door. My girlfriend answered; they asked her if she had any film to give them for free to put into their camera. She said no; they saw our cat, and immediately ran into our apartment, chasing our cat and trying to pick him up. They had to be politely escorted out. I can only imagine how stupid their parents are. These kids are begging to be abducted, molested, and murdered, running into stranger's homes like that. Remember when strangers were every child's mortal enemy?
So if I were to change the title of this node, it would be "People who raise kids in an apartment should be dragged out and shot, after first being tortured thoroughly." Well, maybe that's a little harsh. But I doubt most people under 25 own a house, and I think owning a house is the true hallmark of financial maturity. I'm sure there are far superior apartment complexes out there with far more well-behaved kids, but I really believe that anyone who can't afford a house doesn't DESERVE to have kids. Let the downvotes fall where they may.