As I was drifting off to sleep this afternoon
I realized that I'm not really a kid
anymore. I don't
think of my self as an adult at all, bright red shock of hair
and jog bras
favorite wear, If I was to guess I would say I'm eighteen
, maybe twenty
, but never twenty-seven
But, this afternoon I realized that waitresses don't treat me the same way any more, somewhere along the way they
accepted me as an adult, and someone to be believed
. And, I'm not really sure what to do with that.
Part of me is happy that I am finally being treated with more respect, and part of me wonders what all this
means. I don't know how to live as an adult. I only know how to live as me, but even that has changed without my noticing, I try to be honorable and fair with my dealings with others in ways I never considered before.
I have finally found peace with myself. I finally live in a world surrounded by caring friends, even if some
of them are thousands of miles away. But I don't know what to make of this adulthood thing. I don't think
about it much but every now and then I'm reminded of the fact that thirty is just around the corner, that they will
actually let me buy a house, that getting married isn't that crazy of an idea, illegal, yes, but not crazy, and that the next person I fall for may be the one I spend the
rest of my life with.
Life has taken on a sort of permanence
it never had before. The moment I live in, now
potential to spread across a lifetime.
I don't understand this adulthood, but for now I won't worry about it. My life is