...paranoid. Goddamn paranoid. Just look at the freaks around you. What the hell is that sticky substance? What are those people doing to these lab computers?

There's that girl over there. The one with used tissues all around her desk and computer, like a moat of mucous. She's coughing; that awful hacking cough that makes you just want to whump her on the back to get that great hunk'o'phlegm out of her throat. And she doesn't always get that tissue to her mouth in time- oh no, my friend, she's coughing all over the keyboard. And if you catch her in the light, you can see droplets of spit, thick and green, exploding from her mouth. Landing on the keyboard splat*splat seeping between the keys hack*wheeze and settling in there for the long haul. Nice and sticky. It could be TB, or some horrible flu, or a new mutated virus they don't have a cure for yet. The germs can, and will, live on forever between those n and h keys. Or at least until you get that computer.

And then there's that guy that always sits in the corner. He's shifty looking, and huddles over the keyboard as if it holds the secrets to looking young forever, or earning a million dollars an hour, or sudden sex appeal. Except after a while you get to notice what the guy is doing; amid his sporatic mouse clicking his breathing is getting faster, his eyes are glazing over, and although you can't see his hands... wait, you don't want to see what his hands are doing. He gets up to leave the room suddenly and avoids eye contact on his hurried way out. Sometimes he carries a book in front of him, all casual-like, but sometimes he just runs. You try to forget it, then he returns to his computer, flushed and visibly relaxed. He starts to type quickly; it sounds l ike an assignment or an email. Lots of typing. Interaction with the keyboard. Sticky fingers? Any surplus... stuff... leaking off his hand and melting into the computer, onto the keys?

Maybe he's totally innocent. Maybe that's not semen sticking to his fingers after his quick trips to the toilets. Maybe he's going outside to call his mother, or get some fresh air, or get a bite to eat.

And maybe she's got asthma, and you can't get her germs. Maybe you're imagining the whole phlegm thing. It could just be hayfever or something.

Maybe you should just stop thinking about it. Get back to work. What do you expect in a public computer lab, pristine keys and "normal people" like you? Just clean the fucking keys, you paranoid fool.