The first time I did drugs was when I was 16. I smoked pot after we had this drug education section of health class. The 2 week program was supposed to teach us about the danger of drug use. I never really thought about getting high until then, but they made it sound like such a wonderful thing to do.

The greatest thing about pot was that it gave me a social life. Before that, I could never talk to people, but since talking to people was the only way to get high, I started a long series of social interactions and friendships.

One day, while getting high with my pothead friends, the discussion shifted from Pink Floyd to LSD. At this point weed was getting somewhat boring, and beer wasn't very exciting, so we all decided to trip. The first time everyone else did it, I wasn't there, so this made me want to do it even more. Once I finally did, I couldn't stop. I thought acid was the most wonderful thing ever.

I still think acid is good, although it did drive me nuts every once in a while -- it only lead to one suicide attempt though, and that was in combination with alcohol. The positive aspect of tripping has been the acid logic on which my present world view is based.

Well, once I went to college, I again need something new. Cocaine was that new thing. Rap and cocaine formed my world for a good month as I failed Human Growth and Development and made a B in Topology and Genetics. When I finally was praying to God to let me sleep (I'm an atheist) while my nose bled all over my pillow, I decided to stop.

So then I went to a rave and discovered ecstasy. It was to later become my favorite drug when I moved from Mississippi to Pittsburgh, where raves were commonplace. Before moving to Pittsburgh, I went back to my hometown of Tampa for a few months and there discovered heroin. This is the worst drug that ever was. It feels so good that you become addicted the first time you ever use it. So then you do it again, and before long you're not only psychologically addicted, but physically addicted as well.

Fortunately, I continued my education at the University of Pittsburgh, where (for awhile, anyway) I couldn't find heroin. So this kid who ended up getting my girlfriend pregnant and marrying her asked my if I'd like to smoke some crack. "Sure, why not?" I thought, "what's one more added to the list." It really wasn't such a big deal. Crack is by far the dumbest drug imaginable. You do it once and after a few minutes you come down. Your first thought is that you need to smoke twice as much as you just did. Then you realize how stupid that is and vow never to do it again. The next time I smoked crack, that thought was confirmed and I haven't done it since, and the reason for that second time was just to chill with some crackhead that tried to rob me one time and was trying to be nice.

So I finally settled on ecstasy as my drug of choice after candyflipping every weekend for a few months. The result of rolling every weekend for a few years is not what the media makes it out to be (of course I never could really remember anything). My only complaint is that my serotonin levels are so depleted that I need to take valium to fall asleep before 3am (production of serotonin is what makes you fall asleep, and that production peaks around 3am -- this it the worst time to be driving a car).

So I can't stop doing drugs. The best I can come is to rotate my consumption so that nothing gets boring and the brain damage is spread out rather than concentrated. If life weren't so boring, I'd probably be able to quit, but boredom is the one thing I can't stand...