We're working on beating a dead horse here, but I'm going to through with my little flog anyway.

The thing that no one seems to have mentioned at all here (unless I missed it, which is possible) is not just that "women like assholes," but that people like to feel special. Period. Sometimes people feel special because they have decided that they are special, they like themselves, etc. Sometimes people are looking for a little outside reassurance that they actually are pretty, handsome, cool, sweet, worth dating, etc. Most people are some mixture of both.

So, it begs the question. Why aren't "nice guys" capable of making a girl feel special? Probably because they are generally nice to just about everyone. I've always thought that was kind of the clincher. For someone looking for a tap of self-esteem, nothing works better than someone who is an asshole to everyone else. I must be special, because he told me I was pretty and he just was really cruel to that girl with the glasses, etc. That's overly simplified, but I think there is truth to it.

It's simple human nature. Why do any of us care who votes us up, for example? Why is it better that someone at Lvl 11 has given you a seal of approval than someone at Lvl 1? Probably because (at least we assume) they have achieved a higher level of dominance and thus are more discriminating. Besides, I'd argue that (at least most) women are hard-wired socially and genetically to find someone that can protect them and any possible offspring. In the pack mentality, this means people with dominance, and sometimes arrogance is easy to confuse as such.

In short, if you truly are a "nice guy", you probably don't have too much to worry about in the long run. Monitor your willingness to fall to your knees in the presence of a female and maybe they'll respect you for it. Show an interest in your own success, the improvement of your own life, and most people tend to notice. As for the others, if they're wandering through asshole after asshole, they probably aren't what you need anyway, even if you do worship them.

By the by, it is interesting how often this scenario seems to involve women that are particularly physically attractive. The "nice guy" is just looking for someone to make him feel special, too.


If you're a hard-core grrrl and resent the idea you could even possibly be looking for protection in a mate, I humbly beg forgiveness. I wasn't talking about you .. really.