I think you've just learnt a, if not
the most,
valuable lesson in life, it's an experience every young adult needs to encounter to get to that
next level of maturity; simply,
life isn’t fair. Whether or not your alleged ‘
crap’ is really
horse-dung or not, you still have perceived it as
crap, and have perceived your own work as the
finely tuned Corvette of quality, making the situation unfair
in your eyes. The lesson is the sensation of unfairness, not the objective assertion of quality, which is essentially impossible as the whole issue is centred around subjectivism of taste, especially since you are doing all the judging as appreciated through your own eyes.
This leads me to point out that, chances are, that your work is unlikely much better than the others that you renounce so. For instance, I was noticing a
shag of repetition in your writing, perhaps those purported
evil editors with absolutely no taste have repetition prioritized higher on their fuck-this-new-writer-list; also applicable to any other imperfect aspect of your writing.
And so he pulled out a red flag and waved it around langorously, and it read in large black letters: subjectivism.
And finally, exists the
MTV phenomena. The proverbial question of whether quality of true
artistic value (as hard as it is to ascertain) or the
opiate of the masses should be rewarded. What sells regulates the economy, in turn fulfilling the capitalistic economic cycle and offering work, work which
you seek. Obviously, there is more work in the fields that sell, rather than the fields of style that you appreciate so much more than everyone else who appreciates their sex and violence along with their droll
dialogues,
exposition and
character development.
This point is portrayed vividly in
John Carpenter’s thriller,
In the Mouth of Madness, starring
Sam Neill. A must see.