Today has been
a good day. I found out
for sure that
the ghost of herpes past is in fact nothing but a figment of my imagination, and I am plagued only by the ghost of rugburn present. It was, however, quite the
dramatic ordeal.
I got home and went to sleep until 8:00 am, when the
Planned Parenthood clinic opened. I called, and made an appointment. I told the
clinician my story, and asked if
genital herpes could just hang out and incubate for 2 years. She said it could... I made an appointment for 2:45 pm and tried to go back to sleep. I
dreamt horrible dreams, and then woke up at quarter to two. I cleaned up, and started to
call my boyfriend, then hung up the phone. I figured no sense in
getting him all riled up as well. I put my phone down and there was a knock at the door.
It was him. As soon as I opened the door to let him in, I started
crying uncontrollably. He was understandably
disturbed by my behavior. I explained what was going on, and he was
perfect, completely calm, and told me he loved me.
We went to the clinic together, and I explained my
symptoms, and the
weekend activity to the doctor. She looked around at my parts, and I showed her my little rashy bits. She felt around my bits, and then gently squeezed where my legs meet my pelvis in the front - I guess there are
lymph nodes there - and declared me a victim of nothing worse than
rugburn. I was incredibly happy. She told me to lay off the
corn starch and wear loose clothes, and invest in some
lubricant. Considering the possible outcome, today was a
hella good day, and I learned about what
herpes would actually look like.
Five Things I Am Thankful For Today:
healthy reproductive organs
taco bell 7 layer burritos
having diarrhea instead of vomiting as a side effect of the flu
my
cake assed job
the level of
composure and understanding exhibited by my boyfriend while I insisted that I probably gave him herpes