You know, I'm getting really pissed lately at all of these articles making men out to be nothing more than Homer Simpson clones. Yes, we ARE different from you women, and have some fundamental flaws (like not being able to multi-task as well as you), but I take offense and strongly object to this continual media representation of men as little more than inconsiderate, insensitive, beer-guzzling meatbags, whose collective eyes glaze over upon mention of the word "mauve."

For example, in this one very dumb and pointless article by Randy B. Hecht, entitled "What your mother never told you about men," the author lists five points which imply how men REALLY are. In particular, the third point says that men "have inverse priorities:"

"In Manland, it is utterly unreasonable of you to make such a fuss over the water ring his beer bottle left on the mahogany table that's been in your family for five generations. A crisis, my friend, is what happens if you change the settings on the stereo's graphic equalizer."

Ha. Funny, right? It's just a joke. Maybe. I see it as a glaring commentary on how "funny" it has become to make fun of men. Now, I'm not just getting upset over this one article, rather I'm upset over years of articles I've seen IN MAGAZINES AND NEWSPAPERS like this. While they may seem like jokes, years of exposure to these "light-hearted" articles will (if not already) subconsciously change the minds of women everywhere, affecting their socializations with men, causing women to further unfairly pre-judge us before we even open our mouths to say hello. And, women will also learn to excuse men's behavior with "well, he IS a guy."

I'm sure some men love the prospect of being able to do anything they want and have it all be excused away. I, for one, think that's unfair, and believe that men grow, become smarter, healthier, and happier if held accountable to their sometimes stupid behavior. Women are smart enough to see flaws in their significant others, but they're sometimes not smart enough to voice their thoughts when they see those flaws. How can you expect your man to make you happy if you never tell him when something bothers you? CONTRARY TO ANY STUPID ARTICLE YOU MAY HAVE READ, we DO care what's on your mind, and we want to make you happy (really). When you feel good, we feel good, too...which can lead to us making each other feel good in more creative ways.

Some women may think this is too much work, and some men have already stopped reading (if they even started). He should already be perfect, right, ladies? No drama, right, guys? I don't care. I wish those people happiness in their lives, but I don't believe they'll be truly happy. They'll never get what they truly want because they'll never ask for it. I would venture to guess that those same people are unhappy with other aspects of their lives, and complain about things as if everything was completely out of their control.

And I'm sorry, any woman who marries a guy who can't respect the value of a "mahogany table that's been in your family for five generations" deserves what she gets, water ring and all. The worst part is that these overly insensitive meatbags they're married to are most likely so far beyond repair, that even if you DID voice your thoughts on his leaving his dirty underwear on the bathroom doorknob, it wouldn't do any good because he's grown accustomed to the "well, he IS a guy" way of life. I don't mean to place 100% of the blame on the woman for not saying something sooner (because I believe the guy should know and want to change into something better than a hairy, beer-drinking slug), but it is most definitely a two-way street. If he's a certain way and you never say anything, and even go so far as to marry him, what can you expect? How can you sit back and complain when you saw signs of this behavior back when you were dating?

These articles are also terrible for guys, because then we learn that it's okay to be a beer-loving, drooling half-wit, who's only good for opening stuck pickle jars and fixing the stereo. And after being subconsciously hit with this "information" over years, women come to even EXPECT that kind of behavior from guys! Hello!! Does no one else see something wrong here???

I think Randy B. Hecht should be ashamed for perpetuating the male stereotype, and anyone else who writes uninformative drivel like it. It was funny the first 5 times an article was written like that. I suggest the author find some original material instead of digging into history to find something formulaic and, at best, mildly amusing. Who really reads those articles anymore and gets a genuine belly laugh?

For those who are interested, here's the link to the stupid article:

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