Sanitary Napkin Replenishment Manager

A position has been made available to a qualified Replenishment Manager for our friendly, active household. The successful applicant will show proven history of the following attributes:

• Ability to change a toilet roll when the previous one is used up
• Skilled in disposing of empty roll and any packaging materials (not leaving them on the toilet floor)
• Creative methods in sourcing alternate absorbent materials should the supply run out

Desirable attributes, though not essential, would be:

• In-depth knowledge of deodorising sprays
• Skills in the use of the toilet brush
• Experience in the wiping of drips and pubes from the seat and bowl
• Ability to diagnose common health complaints by scrutinising stool and urine
• Appreciation of loud wind passing by clapping and cheering loudly outside the door

Should this position interest you, please submit your application in writing to:
Tarquinious’ Throne
White house on the hill
That one with all the loud noises and bad smells coming from it
New Zealand