display | more...

The Stoned Pope is a highly satirical underground comic written in 1997 by P. Earwig, published or illustrated by Smell of Steve. I'm really not quite sure; I received a copy of Stoned Pope as a gift some years back. Reading it was rather sickening, but darkly, darkly funny. Ultimately I was unable to keep it in my possession, its contents too haunting and disturbing. Sort of like that videotape in The Ring, I had to pass it on to someone else for the sake of its survival and my own soul. Even though I haven't seen the comic book in years, it has been truly unforgettable and arguably worth sharing. Thus I come here to give a brief summary:

The overweight, drug-addled leader of the Catholic world is surprisingly the most sympathetic character. That is, he stands up in comparison to a clown who unleashes LSD-laced lollipops into playgrounds, or the mafia boss who beats said clown to a pulp. Obviously, the Stoned Pope's indulgences keep him sane in this mad, mad world. Along with the clown, there's also a side-plot involving starving African children and their domineering Catholic missionary (whose appetite is both literal and lustful.) Their misery turns into a riot when we learn that the characters are actually on the wrong side of the highly militarized U.S. / Canada border. America is the land where McDonald's Golden Arches are replaced by abortive clothes hangers, and the latest gadget is a device that lets your fetus inhale cigarette smoke from within the womb. (You know, let them enjoy it while they're young.)

Although he has a severe weakness for drugs, the title character means well, governs as best he can, and does little harm. Unfortunately he gets distracted by grab bags of pills which are  given to him by the comic's main antagonist, Bishop Hitler. Our villian is introduced in a series of panels during which he is masturbating to images of Auschwitz.  In the comic's main narrative thrust, the Bishop plans to release the antichrist on the world. Traversing through a labryinth beneath the Vatican, he explains his evil plan to his sidekick of sorts, a mute, devilish gremlin creature. Jesus (a hermaphroditic quadriplegic chained by the neck) has been impgregnated and imprisoned, waiting to give birth to a prophet of doom. Logically, Bishop Hitler explains, the antichrist needs a human host; the devil's past copulations with goats have only bred horrendous monsters, but nothing apocalyptic. In the comic's final panels, Bishop Hitler has an intimate moment with the imprisoned prophet, considers aborting the baby with a clothes hanger, bows down on his knees before Christ and says, "I love you."

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.