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Tanya was so busy this morning. She didn't even look up.

I pass her desk only in the mornings while entering the office; going there again takes a good reason and so much courage ... I usually have none.

Most mornings she's sitting there sipping morning coffee, gearing up for the day. I see her, ::beams::, looks back, smiles that beautiful smile of her's and says 'Good Morning', I say it back. Some days when no one else is around to distract her yet, I stop by and make some short talk. So how are you?,Oh I am Good, how are you doing, I'm doing Good, (and if can muster enough strength, enough balance in my voice, I add) 'now!'. At this point, she smiles again, sometimes shakes her head like I'm an impossible boy. Sometimes we talk about weather, sometimes the snails on the sidewalk.

But Tanya was so busy this morning ... and it has to be this morning when I was hoping to talk a little more. "Say, can I ask you out for a coffee?" if she had looked a little hesitant at this point, I'd have added "Oh just the 3rd floor cafetaria, nowhere outside the building" quickly, to make it sound a little funny, and if she smiled at this point, I'd have said, rather slowly and softly, "Although, if you don't mind leaving this building, there is this nice little coffee place I know in New York ...", and that would be so funny because we are in California. Maybe that'd have made her smile, laugh even ...

And Maybe we could have been sipping coffee this afternoon in 3th floor office cafe. Damn!

I spent all night planning this ... but Tanya was so busy ...

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