It was back in grade 10 when this knock-out
blonde was roaming the halls of
St. Josheph's
Secondary, that I decided I needed to learn more about
genetics. You see, she had the greatest true blonde curly hair in the world. I am talking golden as the sun and strong and fluffy like
Amanda Marshall's. All the guys wanted her. She was brutally bitchy but in a fun way. And who wouldn't be when all these hormonal teen males were hitting on you? One day
Catherine walked into the
cafeteria and one of the guys I was playing
Euchre with asked if we thought her pubes were as blonde as her hair. I definitively said yes, but I honestly had no clue. I just really hoped they were. True blonde pubic areas are rare, and usually only reserved for
albinos. Anyway, I wanted to find out. But as I was the typical quiet
geeky kid, there was no way in
hell I was going to ask her. That is until I was dared to... I was perhaps the atypical geek, as I fulfilled most of the
attributes of a geek and had my fair share of
harsh nicknames but I had a way with getting women to talk to me about stuff. I'm a
nice guy, you know what I mean. Always the
friend, never the
lover. Getting back to the story, I got to know her a little better in typing class and one day, in a jovial manner, I just popped the
Q: "Cat, are your pubes as blonde as your hair?" At first she was just shocked, then she began to laugh. She was laughing mostly at me, at me for asking this crazy question. She looked straight in my eyes and said: "Jason, look at my eyebrows. What do YOU think?"
I was like:
"What the hell does that mean?" and then I clued in. She was essentially telling me that her pubic hair was the same colour as her eyebrows. I was shocked, amazed that she told me, and intensely turned on by the answer. I knew what she looked like naked. Errr, well I had a better idea than any other guy that had yet to see her. The following weekend I started to research if this in fact was a
factual thing. Was pubic hair colour related to eyebrow hair? My
research did not come through just then, but as I researched more and more, I began to discover that indeed the
gene homology was very close, nearly 100%. This intense research peeked my interest in DNA and the code that makes me and every other living thing a reality. I now do
AIDS research, and not so much solid
genetics, but let me tell you, if I would not have been determined to
solve the
mystery of Catherine's pubic hair colour, I would most likely have ended up designing encryption for
CSIS, the Canadian Security Intelligence Service.
Thank you Catherine, wherever you are!