This is a song by
Ween, from the album
White Pepper.
This song is incredibly peppy-sounding for a concept that sounds so depressing. It's got an irregular rhythm that makes it a bit surprising to listen to, but it's very fun, and sounds incredibly mainstream for a Ween song.
It sounds as though he is watching over a completely insane ex-girlfriend or something, making sure she doesn't damage others or herself:
I was happy this morning
You finally got yourself dressed
Eating raw bacon
It's okay, I was still impressed
This verse is interesting:
Please don't touch my phone book
My friends are getting pissed off
Wake 'em in the morning
Acting like a jerk-off
Likely that's based on a real event, but despite being a fountain of Ween knowledge, I have no idea who they're talking about, if she exists.
This song is © 2000 by Ween, Elektra Records.
White Pepper
Next song on this album: Bananas and Blow