ByteX64

On a cold day in February, bytex64 was born, son of a freak genetic accident between a gryphon and a wildebeest. He immediately began spouting nonsense, and so his genetic parents left him on the doorstep of a tailor in a nearby village. Bytex64 grew up a happy well-adjusted human being until one day, when his father came to him and said, "Son, I'd like for you to take up the family business." Now bytex64 had no real taste for making clothing or fighting giants, so he promptly gathered his things and set out on a journey to find the holy grail. On his journeys he picked up several friends along the way. Now, mind you, these were not living friends, but inanimate objects that he gave names such as "Willie", "Asper", and "Tweedletoes McBuffaloBiscuit". He wandered all across the land, until one day, he found the land of Milk, Honey, and College Education. Through a loophole in the new computerized registration system, he registered for classes at Clitoris University. (A rather unfortunate name, but one rightfully bestowed in honor of the benefactor of the institution, the late Edgar J. Clitoris) He immediately found that he had a natural skill for programming automatic potato peeling machines, and herding wildebeest. It was at Clitoris University that bytex64 met the beautiful and talented Clarissa. For bytex64 it was love at first sight. Clarissa never noticed, mainly because being within 20 feet of Clarissa made bytex64 lose all muscle control in his body. Bytex64 decided that he must do something about the situation, and transferred himself into a computer program that sat on Clarissa's computer. Through a freak accident, he was uploaded to everything2, and has been spouting nonsense there ever since.