This
is my mom's reply
to the note
I wrote her (
I was born this way):
July 8, 2000
Dear Randy,
I appreciate very much your little "snippit" from your online diary. It helps Mom a lot
to know what
your thinking and how
you feel. I'm sorry you feel like I give so many speeches, I am
really only trying to reach out
to you.
I do agree
that a lot of
times it is
much easier to write how you feel about a subject than to talk about it.
In this situation, we are very emotional and we do tend to cry when discussing it.
I just want
to reassure you
how much
I love you and to enforce to you that I would do anything
for you. I want you to understand that I don't love you in spite of you being
gay. I just love you
and I will always love you.
The things that
upset me are the very same things that upset you. I know
your life
will not be
easy and I know that it
is tuff when you are different from the "norm", but at your age it is also tuff just "being"
- sometimes. I won't even
guess how painful and difficult it is to go through what a gay person goes through.
The most important thing to me is that you know that you can come to me under any circumstance, any
time, and any place - to discuss any thing you want
to discuss or
to talk about any problem you
may have. I may not know the answer or I may not even
understand but I will love you and listen to you and try to help
you as much as I can.
This is not because you are gay but because
you are Randy.
I
don't think you realize it
but I very seldom ever thing
about the gay part, but I think about you all
the time. Even though it may seem like it to you, not everything revolves around a persons sexual
preference. Average straight
people very seldom go around announcing that they are average, straight, people. You are very special in your own right, and your sexual preference doesn't
take that away
from you.
And one more thing, if I had the option of being
me and straight or being you and gay,
I would be you
without hesitation.
The thing
that scares me is
in that one
page you mentioned gay suicide and kill myself..
Honey, that really is not an option and
if you ever feel that
way, I want you
to let
me know so I can help you.
Also, please get past this thing of everytime I talk to you or correct you, it's because of the gay thing. Again, it's the Randy thing.
I love you,
Mommy
It was a nice note in theory, but she still treated me the same way she did before...