Last night at Cafe Coco, my friend Cody needed some friendly female advice. He assembled Elizabeth, Victoria (who I do not know well), and myself.
He said, "Before I ask my question... Which of you is the most moral?"

Victoria's hand shot up. Simultaneously, Elizabeth pointed at her. My eyebrows popped up.
"Why are you the most moral, Victoria?"
She looked at me as if I were stupid and replied, "I am a virgin."
I cocked my head. "What does that have to do with morals?"
Her eyes narrowed. "Are you a virgin?"
I looked her straight in the eye and replied, "No." I paused. "You are seventeen years old, correct?"
"I was a virgin when I was your age. When I lost my virginity I was wearing nothing but an engagement ring. I thought I'd found the one I'd spend my life with. I am not ashamed of my choices. Now I want you to tell me why an intact hymen makes an unmarried woman a moral human being."

Cody cleared his throat.

I know that women are judged because of sexuality and promiscuity. I know that people assume I am less intelligent when I am showing cleavage. But I have never been judged in this way by another woman. And I have never had virginity rubbed so smugly in my face.

Do modern women lead such narrow lives that their only moral decisions involve sex? I made hundreds of judgement calls today that had everything to do with integrity, trustworthiness, honesty, kindness... and absolutely nothing to do with my cunt.

I am boiling mad. Look for morality in my deeds, not in my vagina.

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